


There Goes Our Love Again

by reversetheuniverse



Category: Girl Meets World
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, F/M, Friends to Lovers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-14
Updated: 2018-02-06
Packaged: 2019-02-14 15:19:08
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 15
Words: 29,293
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13010550
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/reversetheuniverse/pseuds/reversetheuniverse
Summary: Farkle Minkus had been living in California for quite a while, but when he got a job offer to return back to New York where all his friends were, he couldn't say no. But was he really ready to face all the change that adulthood had brought them, as well as the feelings he thought were long since gone?Life always had a funny way of throwing him for a loop.





	1. Home Is Wherever I'm With You

**Author's Note:**

> Hello!
> 
> So I know it's been a long while since I (or really anyone, for that matter) has really written for riarkle, and I still love them and always will. For me, at least, I've been busy with school and I was in a rut for a while where I just didn't want to write any fics at all, so I didn't. But recently I really got back into it, and this is one of the many wips I have had for gmw sitting in my documents on my laptop for a while that I just decided to pick up on. I really enjoy writing this, so I hope you all enjoy it, as well!
> 
> A special thanks goes out to my betas! Their tumblrs are writerbutanasshole and softboyholland. Your willingness to look over this really helps me a lot, so thank you so much :)
> 
> Oh, and I only have this half-written (I'm going to finish it, no worries) and am releasing the chapters a little at a time so you guys have something to look forward to!

 

Years apart had made him forget the place he once called home, but when Farkle stepped back into the New York air, he felt a calm in himself that he never could quite replicate.

He’s very welcome to start calling New York home once again.

Farkle hailed a taxi like he used to, and the feeling of _rightness_ settled within him, as if this were something he was always meant to come back to. Five years away in another state made him nostalgic for the old days, but he imagined he could recreate some of that something special that once made him so grounded to his hometown in the first place.

As a cab appeared, he climbed inside, offering the driver the address he desired before pausing to check his phone vibrating inside his pocket. He retrieved it as soon as the taxi took off, smiling when he read the name flashing across the screen, having only just sent him a text message.

 

**Riley: you arrive yet? the whole gang is waiting at topanga’s for you**

Farkle responded to her message without hesitation.

 

**Farkle: I just got in not too long ago. I’m in a cab now and I’m headed your way.**

. . .

**Riley: good! see ya soon!! <3 **

Yeah, _definitely_ good to be back.

 

//

Farkle wasn’t expecting a whole party just for him when he arrived at _Topanga’s_ , but it was there all the same, with all of his favorite people waiting just for him: Riley, Maya, Lucas, Zay, and even Smackle. They were there to welcome him back with open arms, and it warmed his heart to see them again.

“Farkle, welcome home!!!” Riley shouted, extending her arms out towards him for a hug. He accepted it without a second thought, anticipating her embrace ever since he found out he’d had a job opportunity back in his old stomping grounds. Maya joined them not too long after, and it’s an incredible reunion. Zay and Lucas each pulled him into a couple of bear hugs after, and then Smackle offered a handshake in true Smackle-fashion, which Farkle wouldn’t change for the world.

“You guys didn’t need to do this,” Farkle insisted, rubbing at the nape of his neck, but Riley shook her head, beaming a wide smile at him.

“Of course we did! The rest of these guys are just thirty minutes away at most, save for Smackle who is just an hour and a half, but you’ve been living out in freaking California!”

“Yeah, Minkus. You just _had_ to go to California and ditch us to be an engineer,” Maya quipped, but Farkle knew she was only playing around. He still didn’t miss the crinkle of her eyes, letting him know she had missed him just as much as he had her. He had missed them all, to be honest. Coming back home was a breath of fresh air. California was fun, but after all this time, he considered it just an extended vacation. He’s back where he belonged.

“Hey, I did come back,” Farkle offered with a grin.

“Come back here to rub it in our faces that you’ve got a fancy-shmancy job?” Zay asked, giving him a noogie. Farkle smirked, smacking his hand away.

“That’s _exactly_ it.”

“Well, thank god you’re here. This one wouldn’t shut up about you ever,” Maya said, pointing to Riley. “It was always, _“I miss Farkle!!”_ or, _“When is Farkle gonna get back?”_ or, _“We’re nothing without Farkle!”_ It was getting tiring.”

“Uhh,” Riley attempted to diffuse the situation and avert attention away from the current subject, her cheeks a noticeable red. “Why don’t sit down and tell us all about California?” Riley asked him instead. Farkle shook his head.

“Not right now. I just really wanna sit with you guys and catch up on what I’ve missed.”

“I can help with that!” Riley exclaimed, grabbing Maya’s wrist and showing off her hand to him. “Look at what Miss Hart here has.” Plain as day on Maya’s fourth finger sat a ring, embellished with a nice hunk of what appeared to be sapphire.

“Huckleberry here finally made me an honest woman,” Maya told him, her face softening. Lucas smiled at her lovingly, his cheeks tinting a gentle pink.

“More like she made me an honest man,” he interjected, to which Zay pitched in with,

“Get a room, you two!” Farkle chuckled, taking a cookie off of the plate in the middle of the table and stealing a bite.

“Anything else? Any other engagements I should know about?” he asked.

“Nope. Your homeboy here is as single as it gets,” Zay answered.

“And Bill and I just broke up,” Riley offered, her brightness dimming a bit at that. Farkle knew they were serious, so hearing that they weren’t together anymore did make him hurt a little for her. He’d talk to her about it later, though.

“I’m too busy for relationships right now. I’ve got science to teach,” Smackle said, and Farkle smiled a bit at that.

“Oh, I’m sure you’ll realize soon that that’s not true, Sugar,” Zay told her affectionately, patting her gently on the back a couple of times before removing his hand. She shot Zay a look that Farkle couldn’t decipher, but Farkle let it pass, more interested in other things at the moment than Zay and Smackle’s possible budding romance.

“I did, however, get a promotion in the office. I have long-since moved on from puff pieces and am now writing real, hard-hitting journalism!” Riley shouted triumphantly.

“Wow, I’m so happy for you!” Farkle chirped, to which the rest of the group agreed.

“Though I am going to miss your “Dear Jexica” columns dearly,” Maya teased her. Riley pouted at that, an expression of sheer disdain clear upon her face.

“Oh, shove it.”

“Yours truly has also been doing well,” Zay said, crossing his arms against his chest. Farkle raised a brow.

“Oh yeah?” Zay’s demeanor faltered at that, and he shook his head.

“No. I’ve been out of a job for the past month and I need a new roommate since Lucas here decided to abandon me.”

 _“Zay,”_ Lucas snapped, but Farkle waved his hand, asking them to settle.

“No, it’s fine. Actually, I’d like to take you up on that offer, Zay. I needed to find a new place anyway, and anything to keep me from staying back at home with my parents is ideal.”

“Lucas, you’re out. Babineaux’s got himself a new bff!”

“But I thought _I_ was your bff,” Lucas muttered dejectedly. Maya patted him on the shoulder sympathetically.

“It’s time you moved on to bigger, greener pastures, Huckleberry.”

“I guess I could have two bffs . . . Yeah, that’ll work. You’re still out of the loft, though, Friar. I’m sick of coming home to you and your fiancé in cahoots,” Zay jibed, causing Lucas to turn several shades of red within the course of one second. The rest of the group broke out in laughter, and Farkle could say that, without a doubt, California was nowhere near as nice as New York with his friends was.

He was willing to stake his life on it.


	2. A Combination Of Love And Aggression

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Uhhhh so for some reason this chapter was unfinished because it wasn't formatting properly. So please read the updated version of this chapter! Because it's much better when ALL OF IT IS THERE THANKS AO3

“Dude, for the last time. Hand me the damn screwdriver,” Farkle grunted, trying desperately to keep the DIY bookshelf he bought from IKEA together.

“No, no, I swear it on my _life_. Yeah, he really just—”

“ISAIAH BABINEAUX, GET OFF YOUR PHONE AND HAND ME THE DAMN SCREWDRIVER ALREADY!!!” Farkle screeched across the loft, causing Zay to drop the phone.

“Jesus Christ, alright, _Farkle_ ,” Zay mumbled, picking his phone back up off the ground, apologizing to the person on the other line before disconnecting. He shoved the phone back into his pocket, retrieving the screwdriver from the table and thrusting it into Farkle’s hand.

“ _Thank you_ ,” Farkle breathed, tightening the screw he had put in, wiping the sweat off his forehead after. “Who were you talking to, anyway?”

“Isadora. I was shit-talking Lucas now that he’s gone. I love the dude, but _man_ did he make living with him extra difficult. You’re not gonna do that to me, are you? I don’t think I could handle a Lucas 2.0 in the loft,” Zay said. Farkle chuckled.

“I’m flattered that I’d even be _considered_ for the position, but no. You’re just getting plain old Farkle Minkus, unfortunately,” Farkle told him, inserting another screw into place.

“Sounds like I’m getting a good deal then,” Zay smiled, returning back to the kitchen where he was before. “You want some toast? I’m making some toast,” he offered. Farkle shook his head.

“No thanks. Make ‘grocery shopping’ next on my to-do list. How could you and Lucas ever live like this, off of toast and cereal?” Zay shrugged, popping a couple pieces of bread into the toaster, turning the dial and pushing down the button to start it.

“We were bachelors in New York for the longest time, man. Also, I worked for the local coffee shop and Lucas was just a counselor for the Y for a long while, so we didn’t have much money.”

“You did get this bomb-ass loft, though. Kudos to that,” Farkle noted.

“Thank you! Lucas almost made us go for the cheaper option, but after seeing that they had to deal with bedbugs, I said _“No way, José!”_  Man thinks he can just live that kind of lifestyle, but not me. I got a reputation to uphold.”

“And ladies to please?” Farkle offered, sighing in frustration when the second screw slipped out of his hand. Zay nodded.

“ _Exactly_.” Farkle tossed the screwdriver to the side after, giving up on the stupid Swedish or whatever the heck kind of bookshelf it was, leaving it for another day. As soon as he got up, his phone buzzed, and he reached into his back pocket to retrieve it.

 

**Riley: You wanna grab some lunch? Maya’s out sampling cake with Lucas and I want to catch up with you :)**

**Farkle: Sounds good to me! You’ll save me from eating toast with Zay.**

**Riley: He eats just toast?**

**Farkle: Trust me, I’m visiting the nearest grocery store after we’re done. I’m not going to eat another bowl of cereal for weeks or get Chinese food for the longest time.**

**Riley: Oh, you poor thing. Portafino’s?**

**Farkle: For the love of god, yes! Real food!!**

**Riley:** **;)**

**Riley: Meet you in twenty!**

Farkle couldn’t have been gladder to have the saving grace that was Riley Matthews in his life, that was for sure.

“Whatcha smilin’ at over there, Minkus? You got a hot date or somethin’?” Zay mumbled through a mouthful of toast.

“Sort of. I’m meeting up with Riley to get some lunch and catch up.”

“Ooooh, so you _do_ have a hot date! I didn’t know you and Matthews still had the hots for each other!” Farkle shot Zay a look of disdain, stuffing his phone back into his pocket.

“We _don’t_. And hey, what do you mean ‘still’? We never had the hots for each other!” Farkle huffed. Zay noogied his head, dodging Farkle’s punch after.

“Alright, I get it. But denial isn’t just a river in Egypt, you follow? Go have fun with Riley, though. And tell her I said hi!”

Farkle could already tell that living with Zay was going to be some kind of something. At least he had that to look forward to.

 

//

 

Despite bickering with Zay for about ten more minutes after setting up the _not-a-date_ with Riley, Farkle arrived ten minutes before her at Portafino’s. He took the opportunity to order himself a glass of Merlot, sipping at it while picking at his navy-blue cardigan in anticipation of Riley’s arrival.

He was nervous. Part of it was because of what Zay said, but Farkle didn’t let that get to him. It was just Riley after all, one of his best friends, and he’d been dying to catch up with her for forever. Hopefully he’d get to do that with the rest of the group, too, but as one on one’s instead of the group chat he had experienced a week ago.

A blur of a black and yellow sunflower dress and lavender perfume flashed by him all of a sudden, the scent so achingly familiar that his heart leapt at the memory. Riley sat down in front of Farkle, her face flushed, her mind clearly abuzz.

“ _OmigoshI’msosorryFarkle,_ ” her words mushed together in her panic. Farkle only grinned, just glad to be out with his friend again.

“Riley, it’s _fine_. I can count on you.” Riley grinned back at him, grabbing the menu in front of her off the table, her eyes scanning it frantically. “Hey, I’ll pay by the way,” he added. Her gaze met his once again, her brow furrowed.

“Oh _come on_. Just because you’ve got a fancy-schmancy job now Farkle doesn’t mean you get to flaunt it in front of me,” she teased. Farkle shrugged.

“I mean, that’s fine if you don’t want whatever you want off the menu . . .” he trailed, Riley taking the bait just as quickly as she used to when they were in high school.

“I’LL TAKE YOUR OFFER,” she interjected, her brown eyes shimmering at the prospect of getting her pick of the menu without limitations. Farkle chuckled to himself.

Old habits die hard, that was for sure.

They spent several minutes searching the menu for what they wanted, only making small side-talk until the waitress arrived, pad of paper in hand.

“Alright, what can I get the lovely couple?” she asked. Farkle almost spat out his wine, swallowing hard before correcting her.

“Oh, we’re not—”

“A couple,” Riley finished for him. “We’re just friends.”

“Of course,” the woman corrected herself. “What can I get for you two?”

“Eggplant Parmesan,” Riley said. “Also, could I get a glass of your house white?” The waitress nodded her head.

“Can do. And for you?” she turned towards Farkle.

“I’ll take the carbonara, please.” They handed her back their menus, only resuming conversation after she had left.

“So how’s living with Zay? Are the two of you getting along okay?” Riley asked.

“Yeah, we’re getting along just fine. Well, my only criticism is that he’s on the phone with Isadora all day, but other than that, we’re good,” Farkle answered, taking a sip from his wine glass.

“You jealous?” Riley questioned, raising a brow. Farkle shook his head, amusement clear upon his face.

“That ship has long since sailed and you know it, Riley. Isadora and I are nothing more than friends. What about you? How do you feel about Lucas and Maya getting married?”

“ _Ha_ ,” Riley barked, throwing her head back in laughter. “Touché, Minkus. That ship has long since sailed for me, too. Those two are made for each other.” The two of them paused for a moment when the waitress dropped by Riley’s glass of wine, Farkle’s demeanor turning serious after.

“So, you didn’t tell me about Bill,” Farkle pointed out. Riley sighed, slumping in her chair, her index finger tracing the rim of her wine glass.

“Yeah . . .”

 _“Riley.”_ He could tell this was hard for her. Farkle didn’t want to push her too hard, but he was her friend, he was there for her. He needed to know.

“It’s . . . okay, so Bill and I got into a fight about a month ago,” Riley exhaled before continuing. “But it all started just before our three-year anniversary hit. I mentioned that we should be doing something big, like moving in together or starting planning for getting married . . . something big like that, you know? Because it was three years, and that’s not too far off base for that, right?”

“Right,” Farkle agreed.

“Well, he agreed that I was right, but he said we should start off small. “Start off small, work up to the big stuff,” he said. And I believed him. He said I should move in the next month. He said he’d circle a date on the calendar and I’d move in on that day, but until then he would help bring my stuff over to his apartment a little at a time. And I agreed that that’d be a good plan. So not long after that, I bought some boxes and started packing.

“But then I tried to get Bill to help me bring some boxes over, and he’d make an excuse each time. “I have to work late tonight,” he’d say, or “Why don’t we just take it easy?” he’d say. He said that each and every time. And then the day came when he said he wanted me to move in, and he gave me some lame excuse as to why we just couldn’t. So then we got into the big fight and were arguing constantly, and then finally I asked if he really wanted me to move in and he gave in saying no, he didn’t want me to. And then I asked if he could see us getting married, and he said no to that, too. So we broke up,” Riley finished, taking a long drink of wine afterward. Farkle reached across the table and grabbed her hand, squeezing it gently.

“I’m sorry, Riles. I know you really liked him.” Riley shrugged.

“Yeah, well, I’ve liked a lot of things in the past that didn’t turn out well. You remember my cheerleading stint?” Farkle snorted.

“I do remember that. You weren’t that bad.” Riley rolled her eyes at that.

“Rose-colored glasses, Farkle. You only say that because I’m your friend and you have no earthly clue how sports work.” Farkle couldn’t argue with that.

“While that may be true, I still say you weren’t bad. And even if you were, you would’ve gotten better at it. I’ve seen what great things you accomplish with a healthy dose of determination.” Riley gave Farkle a slight smile, her cheeks dusting a light pink from his kind words.

“Thanks, Farkle. I really missed you, you know? Things up here haven’t been quite as Farkle-y without you,” she admitted.

“That is true. Well, I missed you, as well, Riley. And everybody else. California was fun, but definitely not for me. I can’t tell you how many sunburns I got while I was down there. Also, I actually had to wear shorts. Can you picture me wearing shorts?” Riley leaned her head into her hand, laughing.

“No, I can’t. New York is _definitely_ a better fit for you, Farkley.” Farkle grinned, his heart happy to be around his best friend once again.

He really missed New York, what could he say?


	3. Reaching For The Sweetest, Sweetest Peaches

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey! So if you read the last chapter (chapter 2) and were wondering, "Huh. This seems like it got cut off/wasn't finished."
> 
> THAT'S BECAUSE IT WAS.
> 
> I had some emojis in the text and the text editor on ao3 didn't like that, so instead of just keeping the text, it cut off where the first emoji appeared. So after realizing my mistake hours later, I went back in, removed the emojis, and now the whole text is there, so go reread it if you haven't already! 
> 
> Also, I meant to mention this, but the title of this fic is from a song by White Lies called "There Goes Your Love Again". Also also, each chapter name are lyrics from a song. So cool stuff.
> 
> Anyway, as always, enjoy! :)

“What about this? What do you guys think about this?” Zay yawned as Lucas rolled out in another suit, this one entirely blue velvet and absolutely _ridiculous_. Even Farkle wouldn’t wear that thing in a wedding.

“Blue velvet? Really man?” Zay remarked.

“Yeah, I have to say, it’s certainly not something I would peg you for,” Farkle agreed, a brow raised at his questionable fashion choice. Lucas narrowed his eyes at them, crossing his arms.

“Okay, Maya said I should “broaden my horizons” while picking out a suit. She said I might find something that was totally us.”

“Not you.”

“ _Definitely_ not you,” Zay blurted. Lucas sighed, picking at the buttons of the suit jacket.

“ _Fiiiiiine._ I’ll go try something else on . . .” As Lucas disappeared back into his dressing room, Farkle’s phone buzzed in his pocket, alerting him to a text. He pulled it out, unlocking the screen and opening the text from Riley.

 

**Riley: bridesmaids dress y/n?**

Attached was a picture of Riley in a completely sequined formal dress that was as ugly as sin. Farkle shook his head in disgust, typing out a reply.

 

**Farkle: Ugh, definitely NOT. Pick another one.**

 

As soon as Lucas reappeared, Farkle stuck his phone back in his pocket, daring to look at whatever monstrosity Lucas had conjured up this time.

“What do you guys think of this one?” he asked, showing the suit off. Farkle and Zay exchanged a quick glance before turning back to Lucas, announcing,

“That’s it.”

“Thank _god_ ,” Lucas huffed, checking himself out in the mirror to make sure it was okay. Farkle definitely couldn’t argue against this one. While this one was blue, it was _not_ velvet, and it had the added appeal of a black vest underneath. He was going to have to wear cowboy boots with it, unfortunately, but if the rest of the outfit was good, then Farkle could suffer. Before he could get up and get measured for a suit of his own, his phone buzzed again, and he took it out to look at it.

 

**Riley: SOS**

**Riley: HELP**

Farkle snorted, his finger sliding over the keyboard on the screen.

 

**Farkle: Isn’t Maya there to help you?**

**. . .**

**Riley: No! The lady took her off to go pick a billion dresses!**

**Riley: She said she trusted me to make a good choice**

**Riley: But now I’m stuck in this dress and I’m too embarrassed to call for help**

**Farkle: Alright what floor are you on you big baby**

**Riley: THANK U THANK U THANK U I’M ON THE THIRD FLOOR**

 

Farkle cursed the day that multi-level wedding boutiques were created.

 

He excused himself from the group, using the bathroom as an excuse to sneak off to where Riley was. Finding the elevator proved to be a little difficult ( _seriously, why was this store so huge?!_ ), but after careful consideration, Farkle walked up to an employee and just asked. He wasn’t about to spend more time perusing a store he didn’t want to be in in the first place.

As soon as he located it and ducked inside, Farkle pressed the ‘3’ button on the elevator panel, patiently waiting for his floor. He took out his phone once he got off, dialing Riley and calling her.

 _“Hello?”_ a panicked Riley answered from the other end.

“Alright, where’s the dressing room where you’re at? I’m near the front desk of the third floor,” Farkle told her. Riley’s breath hitched.

 _“Oh thank god.”_ Farkle snorted. _“Okay, so once you get to the end of the desk, take an immediate right and head down the row of dressing rooms. I’m in the second to last on the left side.”_

“Got it. See you in a sec,” Farkle replied, shutting off the phone and stuffing it back into his pocket. He took Riley’s directions and quickly shuffled off towards the right after passing the desk, immediately faced with a long corridor of dressing rooms. He prayed that he wouldn’t get stopped by some passing dress associate flagging him down for intruding. Well, he was intruding, but that wasn’t the point. He had a good reason.

The stretch of dressing rooms seemed to go on forever as he walked through it, but eventually the end of the hall came into sight, as well as the second to last dressing room on the left, just like Riley told him. Farkle lifted his knuckles to rap gently on the white wooden door, praying this was the correct door.

“Farkle?” came Riley’s muffled voice from behind the door.

“Yup, I’m here. You can let me in.” The door swung open furiously as Riley pulled him inside, locking the door behind them as he gathered his bearings. Farkle turned towards Riley and he stifled a gasp at the sight of her.

Riley was a picture of grace in the dress she wore—a navy-blue, knee-length lace frock, adorned in delicately stitched flowers and swirls, the material becoming transparent at the top to reveal her shoulders. It was classy, sophisticated . . . _beautiful_.

“Well?” Riley asked as he continued to stare at her.

“First of all, definitely this dress. This is the one you guys should wear,” he told her. Riley pouted at him.

“You mean the dress I’m currently _trapped_ in?!” she exclaimed. Farkle shrugged.

“Say what you will, but this’ll go perfectly with the rest of the wedding party. Also, it looks really good on you,” he stuttered on the last bit, his knees feeling a bit wobbly.

“Thanks,” Riley muttered back, her cheeks reddening from embarrassment. “Now will you help me get this dress off?”

Never in his life did Farkle think Riley would utter those words to him, but implications in different situations aside, he pushed it out of his mind, rushing to help her out.

“Yeah, of course. Does this thing have a zipper at all?” he began fiddling with the back of the dress.

“ _No!_ ” Riley shouted. “What the hell did you think I called you up here for?”

“Alright, _alright_ , just relax. We’ll just have to pull it up over your shoulders. Ready?” he asked. Riley breathed.

“As I’ll ever be,” she said, sticking her hands straight in the air. Farkle reached down to pull the dress up from the bottom, assisting her in shucking off the tight garment. They had to shuffle around a bit when it reached her shoulders, but once she slid out of it, she exhaled a sigh of relief.

“Thank you so much, Farkle,” Riley smiled, bringing him into a tight embrace. Farkle held her close, but his mind was very wary of the fact that she was only in a bra and underwear.

Was it hot in there, or was it just him?

“Uh, I should probably get back upstairs to the guys,” Farkle coughed a moment later, eager to let this awkward situation pass. Riley released him and then seemed to remember that she was quite _under-dressed_ , her cheeks burning a vivid scarlet.

“Oh! Sorry about that. Go on. I’ll let you know if I need anything else, okay?” Farkle nodded, waving as he unlocked the door, exiting as fast as possible, his heart an incorrigible mess.

Should he look into that? Should he question why his heart is racing like he’s in a marathon even though he only interacted with Riley, one of his best and closest friends?

. . . No. He’ll just do what he does with every other problem in his life that he doesn’t want to deal with.

 

Repress, repress, repress.

 

 


	4. God Don't Let Me Lose My Mind

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You will get three chapters after this inbetween now and Christmas day. The third chapter is Christmas related. I have more written and more to write, but I just thought it'd be cool to put out a Christmas chapter on Christmas. :)
> 
> Enjoy!

Farkle blinked and suddenly it was October, almost time for Halloween. He’d been buried in piles upon piles of work at his job, and adjusting to his new environment proved to be a tad difficult, go figure. To be fair, engineering was demanding work, so there wasn’t much time to have an “adjustment period”. He was thrown back into projects almost instantaneously, so he concentrated solely on those.

Luckily for him, the gang all planned an outing for Friday night because they all agreed they needed some fun time since all of their jobs were taking up every bit of energy they had.

Never in his life had Farkle been relieved to be invited to get wasted with his friends. He was a little too focused on his education in college to want to wade in those waters, determined as ever to earn his degree as fast as he could. Of course, he did say yes to the occasional outing, but other than that, he was confined to his dorm very much so.

Now? He’d like to get out of the stuffy, indoor atmosphere and be out on the town, laughing and pretending that he doesn’t have to be a grown adult for just one night.

They all deserved it; they really did.

Unfortunately for Farkle, he arrived last, thirty minutes late to the party because work and _blah blah blah_. But he didn’t care; he just plopped down in a seat at their table, immediately ordering a drink and shrugging off his jacket.

“Long day at work, Farkley?” Riley asked, sipping at her piña colada. Farkle buried his head into his arms.

“You can say that,” he mumbled. Maya patted him on the shoulder.

“Oh, chin up, Dr. Farklestein. You’ll get the hang of it. You’re a bigshot engineer now!”

“And besides, we’re not here to talk about work. We’re here to party! Bartender, a round of your strongest shots, please!” Zay shouted, his voice barely reaching above the rest of the bar. The bartender nodded, fixing up their drinks while they waited.

“I take it you guys have already gone crazy and drank a lot within the thirty minutes I was absent?” Farkle asked, giving the waitress a head nod after she dropped of Farkle’s order.

“Nah,” Lucas said at the same time Maya said, “Of course.” Farkle snorted.

Not much had changed with those two. Not really.

“Okay, we did,” Lucas changed his answer hastily, “But only a couple of drinks. I told everyone to hold off on the getting drunk if only to let you get drunk with us.”

“Thanks, man,” Farkle smiled, taking a swig of his drink. “I have to say, though, I’m not looking forward to the hangover in the morning.”

“Focus on the now, not the future, Farkle. Drink and be merry!” Zay exclaimed right as the shots arrived. Zay grabbed one off the tray and the rest of the group followed suit, all of them raising their glasses in the air.

“To getting drunk!” Maya yelled.

“To getting _Farkle_ drunk,” Zay corrected her.

“I’ll drink to that,” Lucas said.

“Same,” Riley echoed her sentiment. They all downed their shots after that, the liquor burning in Farkle’s throat as it went down.

“I’ll order us another round. It’s time we got this party started!” Maya said, raising her hand for the waitress to come over.

“ _Another?_ ” Farkle asked.

“Oh, come on, Dr. Farklestein. We’re gonna get you a PhD in partying by the end of this night!”

“That’s not even possible,” Farkle muttered under his breath, but didn’t complain further. The waitress returned and took another order for shots, disappearing shortly afterward. Farkle went back to sipping on his beer tentatively, worried what his friends were going to bring him this night.

He never really could tell.

They all engaged in some small talk before the waitress had returned again, this time a bottle in hand.

“Here you guys go,” she said, relinquishing the bottle to Zay who had a devilish grin planted upon his face.

“A whole _bottle_?” Farkle griped. Zay nodded his head.

“You bet, Farkle. We’re all going to participate in a drinking game tonight. And you don’t get to Farkle your way out of this.” Farkle shot him a look of disdain.

“Did you just use my name as a verb?”

“We do it a lot when you’re not around, actually,” Riley admitted. Farkle narrowed his eyes at them, unamused.

“You guys are lucky I like you all. Alright, fine,” he gave in, “What’s the drinking game we’re playing?”

“Yay!!!” they all celebrated when Farkle finally agreed. He just huffed in response.

“Okay, so the game we will be playing is—Maya drum roll please,” Zay pointed towards Maya, who began mimicking a drum roll on the table, “. . . NEVER HAVE I EVER!” Farkle leaned back his head.

“Good _lord_.” Riley poked at his face, a bemused smile on her face.

“Lighten up, _Farkley_! This’ll be fun,” she giggled, already starting to appear tipsy. Farkle threw up his hands in defeat.

“Alright, fine! Just start.”

“Sounds good to me,” Zay said, removing the cap to the bottle of liquor and filling everyone’s shot glasses. “So this is how it’ll go: we’ll all take turns going around in a circle, each stating something we haven’t done. But if you have done this thing, then you take a shot. Whoever reaches seven shots loses the game and gets a punishment of the rest of the group’s choosing. We all on board?”

“Yup,” Maya, Lucas, Riley, and Farkle all agreed in unison.

“Great! I’ll go ahead and start,” Zay announced, cracking his knuckles in preparation. “Never have I ever . . . been in a love triangle.” Maya, Riley, and Lucas all groaned.

“Come on,” Riley pouted. Farkle grinned, happy he didn’t have to take a shot for this round.

“It’s the rules, sugar,” Zay shrugged his shoulders. The three of them all took a shot, holding their glasses out for Zay to refill after. “Alright, Lucas. You’re up to bat.”

“Okay, got it. Never have I ever gone skinny dipping.” Everyone took a shot except for Lucas. He raised a brow at Farkle. “Farkle?”

“I’m not proud of it. It’s how my classmates and I celebrated after we got our doctorates,” he answered.

“Wow, nerds really know how to party,” Maya teased him.

“Ha _ha_.”

“You’re up, shortstack.” Maya nodded, waiting until their glasses were full again to begin her turn.

“Never have I ever . . . lived outside of New York,” she said. All the boys grumbled, taking their shots.

“Not fair,” Zay huffed, but Maya only smiled at him angelically.

“Sorry, _sugar_.” Farkle could already feel the room start to spin a bit, the alcohol getting to him quickly.

That was what he signed up for, unfortunately.

“Riley up to bat!”

Riley’s face didn’t change as she tapped her chin thoughtfully, and all Farkle could think was, _Oh crap, she’s about to target me, isn’t she?_

“Never have I ever . . . gotten drunk at my friend’s party and then thrown up in her kitchen sink,” Riley finally stated, her gaze fully on Farkle.

“You told me you wouldn’t tell anyone!” Farkle whined.

“Sorry, Farkley. I really want you to get drunk.” Farkle took his shot, albeit begrudgingly, thrusting it towards Zay for a refill. He felt himself grow bolder with each drink, his mind becoming wicked as he thought up another “Never Have I Ever” statement.

“Never have I ever . . . lost my top in the ocean while on a family vacation,” he stared back at Riley.

“Oh come on! You said you’d keep that a secret!” Riley exclaimed as her cheeks turned beet red, leaning back with the shot.

“And that was my revenge for you, my dearest Riley,” Farkle chuckled. Riley stuck her tongue out at him in response.

The rest of the game went off without hitch, and eventually Riley and Farkle were the two losers, both of them having reached seven shots. They both groaned together when Maya, Lucas, and Zay began laughing at them because they knew _exactly_ what was next:

Their punishment.

If Farkle weren’t feeling so drunk already he might’ve just left the bar in a hurry, but he was, and so he was feeling ready to take on whatever challenge they had in store for him.

“Our punishment for the two of you is—drum roll again please, Maya—get ready . . . KARAOKE!!!” Zay announced, Maya and Lucas cheering alongside him.

“God, this is going to be _terrible_ ,” Riley snorted, and Farkle smiled knocking into her with his elbow.

“Indubitably.”

And terrible it was.

Because, between the two of them, they were _godawful_ singers, exacerbated by the fact that they were indeed drunk. And to make matters worse for Zay, Maya, and Lucas, they were actually into singing karaoke to the point where the three of them had to pry Riley and Farkle off the stage in order to get them to leave.

“~I BLESS THE RAINS DOWN IN AFRICAAAAA!!! GONNA TAKE SOME TIME TO DO THE THINGS WE NEVER HAAAAAAAAAAAAAD!!!!” Farkle and Riley shouted as they swayed together, Farkle’s arm around her shoulders and Riley’s around his as they sung their fifth song in a row.

“Alright, guys, I’m gonna have to insist you get off the stage now. The manager’s _pissed!_ ” Maya shouted to them from below the karaoke stage. Riley put her index finger to her lips sloppily, shaking her head.

“Shhhhhh, peaches! Farkley and I are singing a very important song right now!”

“I’m blaming _you_ for this, Zay,” Maya muttered as she trudged onto the stage, dragging Farkle and Riley off along with her. She was lucky they were drunk or the task would be _impossible_.

“But I wanna sing more songs!” Riley whined, her hand grabbing wistfully towards the microphone.

“Me too!” Farkle cried.

“Nope. Absolutely not. You two are going _home_. Lucas, help me out here!” Maya called out to him.

“On it.” Lucas was by her side at a moment’s notice, grabbing Farkle’s arm and slinging it over his shoulder while Maya took care of Riley.

“You wanna just drop them both at my apartment? I think that might be easiest,” Zay offered.

“Good point, Zay,” Lucas agreed. “Let’s just do that.”

Together, the five of them loaded up into a taxi (yeah, not very “law abiding”, but the taxi driver agreed to shut up about it if they gave him an extra thirty dollars), and drove off towards Zay and Farkle’s apartment, ready to just crash once the night was over even though it was only half past midnight.

The pains of growing up, alas.

Riley and Farkle didn’t shut up the entire taxi ride to the apartment, much to the rest of the group’s chagrin, but by the time they arrived, the two had fallen asleep side-by-side, Riley’s head tucked neatly under Farkle’s.

“I almost hate to wake them up at this point,” Lucas said after he, Maya, and Zay had all slid out of the car. “They look so sweet and peaceful.”

“C’mon, let’s get them inside,” Maya grumbled, tugging at Riley’s arm. “Riiiiiiileeeeeeey,” she crooned, “We’ve got to drop you off. Come on.”

“Mmmmm . . .” Riley moaned but followed Maya’s instructions, reluctantly sliding out of the car. On the other side, Lucas just pulled Farkle out and slung him over his back, thanking the taxi driver and shutting the door.

“Remind me to never get them this drunk again next time,” Maya said as they carried the dead weight of their friends up inside their apartment, all the way to the third floor.

 

The next morning, Farkle was _definitely_ regretting the night. But at least he had fun and he got to spend it with his friends, and for the first time in a long time he felt true, unadulterated happiness course within him once again.


	5. You Weigh On My Mind Like Pieces Of You Stuck To Me

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I swear these chapter titles are getting longer.
> 
> Anyway, enjoy until the next update (either tomorrow or Christmas Eve!)

**BLESS THE RAINS: Are we still on for a chill movie day today?**

**BLESS THE RAINS: I really don’t have anything better to do tbh**

**DOWN IN AFRICA: Of course!**

**DOWN IN AFRICA: Zay ditched me to go visit Smackle anyway**

**DOWN IN AFRICA: So please come save me from my own boredom**

**BLESS THE RAINS: I’ll be over in twenty!**

**DOWN IN AFRICA: You better!!**

It had gotten to that time in New York City where the indoors seemed more inviting than wandering the streets. This was one of the things Farkle didn’t miss at all while out in California, save for the notion of bundling up in warm, woolen sweaters and drinking hot cocoa.

Farkle set a pot of milk on the stove to heat up in preparation of Riley coming over to visit. Unfortunately for her, Maya was usually too busy with Lucas nowadays since they were planning for their wedding in December. Farkle could say the same luck fell upon him, because not only did that factor into his socialization time, but even Zay wasn’t ever in the apartment. He was often away visiting Isadora Smackle ever since they had begun dating.

It seemed like everyone was in a relationship except Farkle. Well, Riley factored into that, too, but she had just gotten out of a three-year relationship, so Farkle didn’t count her. At the very least, that meant that he did have Riley to hang out with. Any time spent with her was welcome time to Farkle.

The door to the apartment erupted with noise not too long afterward. Farkle pulled the pot of milk off the stove, leaving to answer the door afterward. He opened it to a rather frigid Riley Matthews, cheeks rosy from the bitter chill of the wind, her peacoat, gloves, hat, and scarf still not nearly enough to shield her from the dropping temperatures of New York City.

“Yikes! Get inside and bundle up already, will ya? I’m not about to send you to the hospital because of hypothermia,” Farkle jested, rushing her inside.

“Ha _ha_. I’ll be fine, don’t worry about me,” Riley told him, stripping herself of the outside weather clothing she was wearing. “Okay, I hope you don’t mind, but I brought _Much Ado About Nothing_. I’ve been on a Shakespeare stint lately.”

“Riley, _Shakespeare In Love_ does _not_ count as Shakespeare,” Farkle pointed out. Riley stuck her tongue out at him.

“Stop sassing me and serve up the hot cocoa already, genius!” Farkle laughed as he walked over to the stove while Riley popped in the movie. He also made sure to pop up some popcorn, because what movie could be watched without popcorn?

After placing a bag in the microwave and turning it on, Farkle retrieved two mugs from his cupboard, one that said “#1 Genius” and another that said “World’s Best Grandpa”.

“Which mug do you want?” he called out to Riley in the other room. “#1 Genius or World’s Best Grandpa?”

“World’s Best Grandpa!” she shouted back to him. Farkle went ahead and poured hot chocolate into the mugs, topping Riley’s with whipped cream and chocolate sprinkles. The microwave dinged not long after and Farkle took the popcorn out, pouring it into one of the plastic bowls sitting out on the counter. With a mug in each hand and the popcorn bowl in the crook of his elbow, Farkle set off for the living room where Riley was sprawled out on his couch, snuggled up in the throw blanket he kept on it.

“Cozy?” he asked her with a brow raised, nudging her leg with his knee.

“Mhmm,” Riley muttered, a smile on her face, the blanket hugged up to her chin.

“Too cozy for hot chocolate?” Riley sat up immediately at that, her eyes bright.

“Hot chocolate!” Farkle handed over her mug that was decked out to the nines with sugary goodness, and Riley took it happily, stealing a sip from it as he sat down on the couch beside her.

“Bon appétit,” he said as he settled the bowl of popcorn on the coffee table in front of him, stretching his feet out and relaxing as he sipped at his own hot chocolate.

“You know me so well, Farkle. This hot chocolate is _delicious_ ,” Riley grinned. Farkle pointed at his upper lip.

“Whipped cream, Riles.” Riley shrugged, wiping the whipped cream moustache she had accumulated off her lip. Farkle shook his head, chuckling to himself as he picked up the remote to start the movie. “Ready?”

“ _Definitely_ ,” she agreed, and Farkle pressed the play button, sighing as he got himself settled in his spot.

As the music to the movie started and a woman spoke the words appearing on the screen, Riley grabbed the bowl of popcorn off the table and then leaned against Farkle, snuggling up beside him. Farkle felt his muscles tense up as she did so, his heart thrumming faster in his chest. He became hyper-aware of her every movement, every breath she took, and Farkle just couldn’t understand.

This was Riley. _Riley_ , his best friend of twenty odd years or so! Why would he be this way around her? Wasn’t he long over this schoolboy crush of his on her? They’d both changed so much, had been apart for quite a few years. It didn’t make sense that he would feel the same way he did when he was younger; he’d since let those feelings go, but was that truly it, or was it just because he had been passed from girlfriend to girlfriend since Isadora, and that he was finally experiencing being around her again, unattached?

Farkle felt like he was about to have a heart attack or a stroke or something.

He remained quiet for the duration of the movie, his mind buzzing with a billion thoughts, unable to focus on anything except the fact that he might have to deal with _feelings_ again, and that was indubitably out of his skillset.

No. _No_ , he was _not_ about to deal with this again! Farkle knew _exactly_ where chasing Riley got him, and he wasn’t about to revisit that avenue of his life. And besides, Riley meant the world to him. Why would he do something like ruin a good friendship like they had just because he got a burning feeling in his chest every time he so much as looked at her?

Farkle wasn’t stupid, that was for sure.

So he kept it to himself, and he pretended that he could handle being this close to her, when in reality, he was dying of an overwhelming high and warm regard for her, one that he couldn’t just shut off and pretend like it wasn’t there.

But _damnit_ if he wasn’t going to try.


	6. I Think I Was Blind Before I Met You

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I haven't finished the Christmas chapter yet (the next one), so we'll see if I get it out tomorrow since it's, ya know, Christmas and B U S Y. But I want to try to finish it and post it, and if not, it'll be up by the 27th at the latest!
> 
> Thanks for reading! :)

Maya and Lucas’ wonderful winter wedding blew on into their lives like a quick, north wind, throwing Farkle for a loop. For the first time, it actually settled in his mind that he was an adult and his best friends were getting _married_. Everything was falling into place in some sort of way, but he couldn’t help but feel like he didn’t have a place to stand.

How could he be having a midlife crisis already when he’d only lived a quarter of his projected life?

Farkle didn’t have much time to ruminate on the subject, fortunately, because the last week before the wedding became so busy he just _couldn’t_. If he wasn’t helping Lucas calm his nerves, he was at Maya’s side to help with any little hiccup that came up.

And don’t even get him started on the bachelor party.

Lucas’ cousins from Texas decided to fly up a day earlier than planned to assist in creating a bachelor party “well suited for Lucas”. In all honesty, Farkle didn’t mind having them take over the party planning—Farkle didn’t know the first thing about what to have at a bachelor party, and even if he tried, the whole event would’ve been focused around his own personal tastes rather than Lucas’ own.

He and Zay allowed the cousins to take over their apartment for the entire afternoon to set up for the party. They decided to leave them to it and just go out for a bit to relax, because they really, _really_ needed it. The week could only continue being chaotic until the whole thing was over, so they took any break they could get. And when the cousins texted Farkle to let him know they were finished and they “better get yer asses over here!!”, he and Zay returned to the apartment with a sigh, sad that their day of respite was done and that they were had no idea what they were about to walk into.

When they finally got to up to the apartment, however, the place wasn’t as crazy as Farkle thought it might be—just homemade banners with congratulations on it, balloons and confetti scattered about, and the pungent but delicious smell of fried chicken emanating from the kitchen. The cousins all waved when Zay and Farkle walked inside, and the whole thing seemed very comfortable and southern. But then Farkle peered over at the table to see it covered in bottles of whiskey, and his only thought was,

_Oh shit._

Lucas arrived not long after and everyone tackled him in a big bear hug (everyone meaning the cousins pulling them all in together). They wrangled him and put a gaudy cowboy hat on him adorned in rhinestones that spelled out “ _BACHELOR”_ and guided him toward the dining room table, each passing along a bottle of whiskey until everyone had one. They all uncorked their bottles and then clinked them up against one another, saying, “To Lucas!” before downing the entire contents of the bottle.

And that was the last Farkle could remember of the night.

He woke up the next morning with a headache the size of Texas and the need to vomit profusely, vowing never, _ever_ to have a bachelor party like the one he just experienced.

Good thing all of his cousins were just rich nerds.

The only thing that managed to pull Farkle out of his bed after the long night he had was a text he received.

 

**BLESS THE RAINS: Have you seen Lucas?**

**BLESS THE RAINS: He was supposed to be at Monte’s at 11 with Maya**

**BLESS THE RAINS: They’re supposed to be eating brunch with their parents**

**BLESS THE RAINS: How hard did you guys go last night?**

**BLESS THE RAINS: Alright, I’m going to assume you went pretty hard last night.**

**BLESS THE RAINS: I’m just going to keep texting you until you get your ass up and make sure that Lucas is dressed and over at Monte’s ASAP**

_Shit._

Farkle decided to call Riley instead of responding to her billion texts she was still in the process of sending.

_Ring, ring. Ring, ring. Ring—_

_“Farkle, what the hell are you guys doing?! We’ve been trying to get in contact with you for the past couple of hours!”_ Riley yelled at him from the other end.

“I’m not going to lie to you, Riley, but I have been passed out since some time in the morning. I’m going to guess the same for Lucas,” Farkle sighed.

 _“Well then, get up off your ass now that you’re up and get Lucas over here!”_ Riley shouted before hanging up. Farkle rubbed at his forehead, fighting through the hangover as he left his room in search of Lucas.

Farkle ignored the obvious mess they had created in his living room, searching amongst the bodies scattered on the floor passed out for his best friend. Unfortunately, from the back Lucas and his cousins looked practically the same. He ended up finding Lucas passed out in the bathroom, and he leaned down to shake him to wake him up.

“C’mon, Lucas, we gotta get you out of here. Maya’s getting pretty peeved that you aren’t at Monte’s.”

“. . . Mhmmm,” Lucas groaned as he came to, his lips pursed. “Don’ wanna ge’ up.”

“Too bad, so sad, buddy. We gotta go.” Farkle fought to get Lucas off the floor but to no avail. Instead of continuing that sad struggle, Farkle decided to try to pull Lucas into the bathtub so he could just turn on the cold water to wake him up.

Which also proved to be a problem, considering that Lucas was just pounds of muscle and Farkle was a weakling, but he got him in eventually, taking a moment to find his breath before hitting his best friend with the cold water.

Needless to say, Lucas was _not_ happy and swore liberally once he was up, but Farkle frankly couldn’t give a shit. He offered a set of Zay’s clothes to change into before just sending him out of the apartment, desperate not to get an earful from Maya.

Farkle shut the door after Lucas left, returning to his room and collapsing on his bed, resigning the rest of the day to sleeping and (hopefully) not vomiting.

He was owed _at least_ that before he had to deal with the stress that was Lucas and Maya’s wedding the next day.

And if he thought the stress leading up to the wedding was too much, then the wedding _itself_ was probably going to be a doozy.

 

//

****

The day started off easy. Farkle woke up early, feeling a little rested and less barfy than the day before, and even though it wasn’t his own wedding, he couldn’t help but be a little nervous.

Two of his best friends were getting married to each other, and he couldn’t be happier. He just wished everything wasn’t flashing by him so quickly, but Farkle had other matters to deal with currently rather than his own existential depression.

He walked out of his own room first just to check and see that Zay was awake. Sure enough, he was passed out face-down on his pillow. Farkle rolled his eyes, slapping Zay’s arm a couple of times before successfully waking him up.

“God, do we gotta be up at this time? It’s eight in the morning!” Zay exclaimed. Farkle nodded his head.

“’Fraid so, man. C’mon, let’s get up and get some breakfast first.”

Farkle invited Riley to tag along with them, but after ten minutes of radio silence, Farkle arrived at the conclusion that Riley was sleeping in, and that he’d rather let Maya wake her up at this point. He had enough of waking non-morning people up to last him a lifetime.

He and Zay grabbed a quick breakfast from a diner just a block down from them, practically inhaling the eggs, bacon, and toast placed in front of them. Farkle figured he’d load up on food since they wouldn’t be getting any other food until the evening, and Zay just figured he’d load up on food because he just liked to eat. They paid for their food and left not too long after, returning to their apartment to clean up and get dressed for the big day.

After just taking a quick shower, Maya had bombarded Farkle with a million texts demanding that he "better be getting ready: or she was "going to personally walk over" to their apartment and "rip off" their . . . parts. Farkle could already tell that the wedding was going to be a joyous time.

He towel-dried his hair before pulling his neatly-hung suit out of his closet, removing the plastic cover to unveil the suit to him, crisp and untouched. Farkle didn’t like to brag, nor could he ever find a reason to about himself, but he knew for a _fact_ that he was going to look good in this suit.

Once he’s taken a painstakingly long time to pull the suit on, Farkle slipped into his shiny, black Oxfords (thank  _God_ Lucas budged on the cowboy boot idea) and tied them up, studying himself in the mirror afterward to check and see that everything was in place. He gelled his hair into a delicate quaff before finally deciding he was ready to go, sliding his wallet and phone into his pocket and moving to the living room to wait for Zay to finish up.

Zay emerged out of his room half an hour later, but he and Farkle were too busy complimenting each other for Farkle to be mad at the wait. Zay found his own wallet and the two departed, hailing a taxi when they reached the sidewalk. The taxi pulled up not too long after and they set off for the chapel Maya and Lucas had chosen, Farkle bobbing his leg up and down while they sat in the car.

It was suddenly becoming all too real. He was going to meet up with Lucas and then they’d be an hour out from Lucas and Maya getting married. It was ridiculous how fast it was occurring, like he had smacked his head on the counter or something, blacked out, and it was a week later without Farkle even experiencing it. He wondered if Zay was thinking the same thing, or if Riley was experiencing it even worse. After all, this was her best friend from day one, _Maya Hart_ , getting married, her life moving on in a big direction. Farkle couldn’t imagine Riley being anything but anxious while hiding the fact that she was anxious.

She was pretty good at hiding her intense emotions, but Farkle would like to say he’d gotten pretty good at deciphering her.

They finally arrived at the pristine, white chapel, unloading out of the car so they could go inside. There were signs posted up pointing the wedding party toward the side of the chapel (left for the groom, right for the bride) and he and Zay followed until they reached a side door, entering inside to find Lucas tying his bow tie, surrounded by the cousins they met the other day as well as several uncles and his grand pappy. Farkle could tell he was getting nervous by the attention, so he directed the rest of the men outside of the room, telling them they could go take a seat inside the chapel while Zay and Farkle handled Lucas.

“Thank you guys,” Lucas sighed as he struggled to get his bow tie tied, dropping it in resignation. Zay batted his hands away, tying it up himself before stepping back to get a good look at Lucas. 

“There you go. Ready to get married?” Lucas’ face went pale.

“I don’t know . . .” he trailed, but Farkle shook his head.

“Of course you don’t _know_ , but you’re about to marry one of the best damn women out there. No one is prepared for marriage, but you love her, right?” Lucas nodded his head. “Then you’re gonna go out there and have the time of your life, and by the end of the day it’ll just be you, Lucas Friar, and Maya as Mrs. Maya Friar. Sound good?” Lucas smiled at Farkle.

“Yeah, it sounds really good. I have been waiting for this day for a long while.”

“You’ll do good, man. Maya’s your soulmate,” Zay grabbed Lucas by the shoulders, grounding him.

“Riley and Isadora here yet?” Farkle interrupted.

“Yeah, they arrived not much before you. You guys got lucky on your dates. Those two look gorgeous,” Lucas answered. Farkle felt himself blush at the prospect of Riley being his “date”.

“I’m not really sure they’re our dates,” Farkle protested.

“Speak for yourself, Minkus. Isadora is _definitely_ my date,” Zay pointed out.

“You afraid to have Riley as your date, Farkle?” Lucas grinned mischievously. Farkle placed his hands over his ears and shut his eyes, turning around.

“Oh _hell_ no. I’m not going to get into this right now. See? I’m not listening!”

“Very mature, Farkle,” Riley said as she stepped in the room, smirking at him.

Farkle’s world stopped after he opened his eyes and looked at her for the first time today, wearing the dress he had helped her out of a few months back, this time the material fitted perfectly around her figure. On her right wrist was a corsage made of tiny white and powder-blue flowers, and on top of her head lay a flower crown of the same tiny flowers. Farkle could _swear_ he hadn’t seen a painting that could best Riley in this very moment, and he’d visited the Met on numerous occasions.

“Lookin’ good, sugar!” Zay shouted behind him, breaking him from his Riley-induced reverie. Riley curtsied, her eyes crinkling after.

“Smackle better not hear you say that, Zay,” Riley said before turning her attention back towards Farkle. “Did you and Zay get your boutonnieres yet?” Farkle shook his head.

“No, we just got here. Do you have them?”

“Yeah, I do. Zay, c’mon! We gotta ditch Lucas a moment so that we can pin your boutonnieres on you!” she exclaimed. Farkle and Zay trailed behind her as they left the room and went back outside.

“I didn’t realize that we were playing ‘pin the boutonniere on the groomsman,” Zay jested. Riley stuck her tongue out at him.

“Oh shush. It won’t take that long, I _promise_. We’ll let you get back to your boyfriend Lucas afterward.” Zay reached to gently tug on one of Riley’s curls done up for the wedding.

“Thank ya, sugar.” 

Farkle suppressed the urge to feel jealous, reminding himself of two things: one, that Zay was very much so involved with Isadora now, and two, that Riley was _not_ his to be jealous about.

Besides, wasn’t he trying to _ignore_ any thoughts about Riley?

Farkle buried down deep any other thought on the subject, focusing in on their number one objective: get their boutonnieres and then return to Lucas.

Once they reached the other side of the chapel, Riley halted them with her hand, holding up her index finger before disappearing inside the bride’s chambers. She returned a moment later with two plastic boxes in hand, each one containing a boutonniere with flowers that matched her own corsage. First Zay stepped up to bat, allowing Riley to pin the boutonniere on for him. It took her a moment of intense concentration, and Farkle chuckled to himself when she stuck out her tongue while doing so, but then Zay was on his way, leaving only Riley and Farkle at the side of the chapel.

Farkle swallowed hard as she tugged on his jacket pocket to pull him closer, her body only an inch away from his as she fiddled with the boutonniere to put it into place. Now that he was beside her, he could smell the faint scent of her perfume she always wore—lavender—and he could feel himself start to get light-headed.

“There, good to go,” Riley said when she finally finished pinning the boutonniere to his pocket. She patted his chest a couple of times and then beamed up at him, her brown eyes sparkling from the sunlight above.

“Thanks, Riles,” Farkle muttered before finally willing his feet to take him back towards Lucas’ side of the chapel.

Boy was he  _f u c k e d._

When he returned, it was just a waiting game between the three of them as they puttered about the room, messing with things and making idle chatter. Farkle could feel himself on edge as they waited, and just as he was about to run out of the room due to being stir-crazy, the ringbearer, Lucas’ younger brother, came to get them. Lucas disappeared behind the side door into the chapel while Zay and Farkle followed Lucas’ brother, their collars growing tighter in anticipation.

Farkle found Riley almost instantaneously (not that he was looking for her or anything), joining her side with the rest of the bridal party.

“Ready to escort me down the aisle, Minkus?” Riley asked him cheekily. Farkle’s Adam’s apple bobbed up and down visibly as he swallowed hard, but he linked arms with Riley, ignoring the butterfly-feeling in the pit of his stomach.

“More like you’re escorting _me_ down the aisle. Don’t be sexist, Riley,” Farkle retorted. Riley pretend-gaped at him, touching her hand to her chest.

“Wow! I can’t believe you’d pull my own moves on me!” Farkle chuckled, winking at her.

“I learn from the best. Now, are _you_ ready to escort _me_ down the aisle?” Riley snorted, smiling.

“How about we both do it together?”

Farkle couldn’t argue with that logic.

Soon, the music started up inside the chapel and the doors swung open, and it was Riley and Farkle walking down the aisle side-by-side.

And if Farkle entertained the idea of it being him at the altar, waiting for Riley to make her way up the aisle toward him, he never voiced it aloud.

 

//

 

After taking about a billion photos of the wedding party together, they were all allowed to leave for the reception. Farkle sighed in relief, his stomach rumbling and ready for food. He knew that, in reality, it would most likely be an hour or so longer until they were able to eat, but he could deal with that. The barrage of photos practically killed him, so to be done with them took a big weight off his shoulders he was well aware of.

Just a ride, more talking, and then they’d  _finally_ be able to eat the food they (or him, at the very least) were paying dearly for.

On the bright side, this wedding had proved to be a learning curve for him—Farkle was learning everything he _wouldn’t_ do when it was his time to tie the knot.

Farkle tried to find Zay so that they could call a cab, but he seemed to have disappeared from sight. Riley sneaked up behind him, tapping him on the shoulder to gain his attention, effectively making him jump in surprise.

“ _Jesus_ ,” Farkle huffed at Riley, whose only response was to cackle loudly. “Don’t scare a man like that!”

“Geez, Farkle, I didn’t realize my presence scared you so badly,” she chuckled.

Riley didn’t know the half of it.

“Whatever. Have you seen Zay around? We were supposed to catch a cab over to the reception together,” he told her.

“That’s what I was going to talk to you about. He already left with Smackle not too long ago. He said we could get a ride together,” Riley explained. Farkle narrowed his eyes.

Damn that dastardly bastard and his slick moves.

“Of course, Riley. Here, I’ll call one up now.”

Farkle did so, ignoring the bubbling in his chest from the proximity to Riley. She really knew how to torture him, her arm hanging off his shoulder as she gazed at him while he made the call. He really hated how she had his heart in an unbreakable chokehold.

“He’ll be over in less than ten minutes,” Farkle announced as soon as he got off the phone, sliding it back into his pocket.

“Are you mad that Zay ditched you for Smackle and left you with me?” Riley teased.

“Mad that he left me with Riley Matthews? _Never_ ,” Farkle smiled at her. “There are worse things out there, anyway,” he added. She stuck her tongue out at him, punching him playfully on the arm.

“You’re the worst, Farkle Minkus. Have I ever told you that I love having you back with us again?”

“You could stand to mention that more . . .” Farkle trailed, feeling heat prickle at his cheeks.

“Now don’t go getting a big ego, Minkus. We can’t let that genius head of yours get too big now,” she patted his cheek affectionately.

Before he could retort, the cab appeared and his moment with Riley ended abruptly. Farkle opened the door for Riley and then went over to his own side, giving the cab driver the address to the reception, riding the whole way over in silence. He paid the driver once they arrived and followed the sidewalk up to the archway of the building decorated with balloons and a banner that read, _“CONGRATS TO THE HAPPY COUPLE!”_ When they entered, inside, they took a seat at the table where Lucas, Maya, Zay, and Isadora were already waiting for them. Farkle sat down in the empty seat next to Isadora and Riley in the one next to Maya, getting an earful from their friends not too long after.

“It’s about time you showed up!” Maya exclaimed.

“We would’ve been here earlier but the person I was _supposed_ to catch a ride with,” Farkle shot a pointed look at Zay, “Ditched me.”

“Listen, I would be sorry, but I’m not,” Zay shrugged. Smackle grinned at him and Farkle made a retching face.

“ _Gross_. I’m going to need you two to tone it down.”

“Alright, enough bickering. It’s time for us to get this reception started!” Lucas interrupted, standing up to silence everyone in the room. “Everyone, settle down please! I’d like to start off the toasting, if that’s okay? I’ve got a few words to say to my lovely new wife.” Everyone in the room hooted and hollered in response, ready to hear what Lucas had to say. Maya beamed up at him, the fondness in her eyes crystal-clear. Lucas held out his hand and she took it, allowing him to raise her up next to him.

“Maya Hart,” he began, using her maiden name because it was second nature to him, “My _Short-stack_ , you’re the best thing that could’ve happened to me. Had I known all those years ago that all our bickering and name-calling was flirting, I wouldn’t have second-guessed us. I did, though, and that was my mistake. But somehow we found our way back to each other, and when we did, I never wanted to let go. I knew that each morning I wanted to wake up next to your brilliant blue eyes and pearlescent smile, and that a day spent without that was the worst feeling in the world. You’re my everything and inbetween, and the day you lassoed my heart was the day I knew we would be inseparable.

“And now you’re my wife. I actually get to spend every day waking up next to you like I wanted, getting to see those eyes and that smile without having to worry about there being a break inbetween. I get to create a home with you and start a brand-new chapter of my life with you, and I wouldn’t change that for the world. I love you, Maya, to the end of the universe and back.”

Lucas’ entire family cheered for him wildly as he kissed Maya at the end of his speech, and Farkle couldn’t help but roll his eyes at them, smirking. After they kissed, Maya invited him to stay standing so she could start her own toast.

“Alright, I guess I’ve gotta say some words about my wonderful husband here,” Maya started in true Maya-fashion, “And so I’m going to be brutally honest because that’s who I am. I’m not going to lie—when I first met you, I _hated_ you. I didn’t think anyone could be good enough for my Riley here, so my instinct was to fight you. It was easy to hide my feelings behind a wall of insults and names, so that’s what I did to you. And, not to rag on you, babe, but you weren’t good enough for her. But that’s okay, because we were so young! We had no idea about love because we were a bunch of dumb, young idiots who thought we had the world figured out.

“We needed time to grow, though, and grow we did. You and I remained friends in college, and after a month or two of not talking to each other, we just sort of . . . bumped into one another. And then it sparked something within us, that something that we needed time to create and learn about. You started hanging out with me again, and study dates turned into lunch dates and then somehow into real dates, and suddenly we were real. I had a hard time coming to terms with that, but Riley insisted that I let myself fall for you because I deserved to, and I listened to her. It was the best decision I ever made. I wouldn’t ever take back my decision, and I’ll never take back my decision to marry you. I love you, Lucas Friar, my Ranger Rick, my Lone Star, my Huckleberry. Forever and always.”

As sweet as the toasts were after Maya and Lucas’, Farkle was glad when they were finally over, because was he ever ready to eat. He practically elbowed his way through the crowd to fill up his plate, and when the rest of the table finally sat down with him, he had almost demolished his plate entirely.

“Geez, Farkle, you’re all skin and bones. I don’t think I’ve ever seen you eat so much,” Lucas commented, gesturing to his plate.

“You have no idea how hungry I’ve been,” he tried to argue, but Lucas raised his brows at him, giving him a skeptical look.

“Oh, don’t I?”

“Touché.”

It was nice to be able to talk to everyone as a group once again, and Farkle speculated that this was probably going to be the last time for a long while that they’d be able to, but he didn’t spend time focusing on that. He knew it would just depress him, so instead he enjoyed the time he could share with them all, all the while sneaking in more food to devour as he did so.

Eventually the eating portion of the evening came to a standstill and the real music began to play. Maya and Lucas rose from the table towards the center of the room where the dance floor was, and everyone fell silent as they began to dance to their first song as a married couple, “The First Day of My Life.”

 

_“Yours was the first face that I saw_

_I think I was blind before I met you_

_I don't know where I am, I don't know where I've been_

_But I know where I want to go.”_

 

It was beautiful, and Farkle would even admit that he teared up for his friends’ happiness, expressions of absolute contentment upon their faces. He didn’t even flinch a bit when Riley rested her chin on his shoulder, humming softly along with the music as she watched them.

After the song ended, a more fast-paced song began playing and everyone got up and began dancing. Maya ran over and pulled Riley off her chair, beckoning her to the dance floor. Zay looked over at Isadora and smiled, pulling her out to the dance floor, as well. Farkle sighed, resting his chin in his hand.

Typical.

He alternated between picking at his plate and checking his phone for notifications that were forever absent until Maya appeared at his side several songs later, looking at him with a determined face.

“C’mon, get up, Minkus! It’s your turn to dance with me!” Farkle couldn’t deny Maya of that even if he wanted to, so he stood up from his seat and allowed Maya to tug him over to the dance floor, ready to invest his time in crazy dance shenanigans with her.

“Boy, you really are stiff as a robot, Farkle! C’mon, loosen up a bit! You owe me that at least!” Maya shouted at him over the music. Farkle laughed, throwing his head back.

“I’ll try! You know I’m awful at anything that requires muscular movement!” She shook her head at him, grabbing his hands and jumping down with him.

“Here, we’ll start easy. Jumping easy enough for you?”

“I think I can manage that, Mrs. Friar,” he grinned cheekily.

“Ugh, don’t call me that! You make me sound like an old lady,” Maya scrunched her nose up in disgust.

“You _are_ an old lady, though! You’re all married now and everything!” Farkle joked. Maya slapped him on the arm.

“Quit ruining our moment! It’s a good thing I didn’t marry you, Farkle Minkus,” she teased back. Farkle took no offense at that comment, knowing it to be endearing, not vicious.

“Oh, please! You couldn’t handle being my wife! We’ve always been better off as friends.”

“Best friends!” she agreed, spinning around in a circle with him. “Besides, there’s other people you’re more compatible with,” she added as soon as the song came to an end. “Speaking of—hey, Riley! C’mon over here and take the Farkle for a spin!”

Riley came over as soon as she heard them and Maya cackled, knowing _exactly_ the kind of situation she was pushing Farkle into. Farkle groaned but gave in, stopping Maya for a moment just to give her a little blessing of his own in case he wasn’t able to before she left for the night.

“Alright, Maya, I guess I’ll give you up. You be good, okay? Just if, you know, I don’t see you before you leave,” Farkle told her, planting a gentle kiss on top of her head. She smiled at him and nodded, placing a chaste kiss on his cheek and then disappearing in the crowd to find someone else to latch onto. Riley cleared her throat to gain Farkle’s attention, her chocolate-brown eyes wide and bright.

“I believe you owe me a dance right now?”

“Of course,” he said, carefully placing his hands on her waist to match the tune of the slow song playing. He silently cursed Maya for picking this _exact_ moment to have him dance with Riley, but he knew she only meant well. He couldn’t be too mad at her, after all.

“Um, don’t I get a kiss on the forehead, too? Or do you not love me anymore, Farkle Minkus?” Riley asked him, causing him to choke a little.

Did she know she was teasing him? Was she just trying her best to torture him? Farkle decided that Riley was too oblivious in the end, and that she really didn’t know the depths to which his love for her extended.

 _“Needy,”_ he breathed but obliged, placing a delicate kiss on her forehead. Riley’s lips curled upward, her eyes crinkling as they swayed together to the music.

They stayed like that, quiet as they danced along to the tender melody, their eyes focused on everything _but_ each other. Farkle hated that he couldn’t just enjoy the two of them the way they were—as best friends. He always was greedy, always wanted more from her than the enough she had already given him. But Farkle could never be satisfied, however, and for the first time since he returned to New York, he could feel the regret course throughout his system.

He shouldn’t have returned. Farkle’s only desire was to mess things up, to shift the order of things that had an order for a very good reason. He was never going to move on from his crush on Riley if he remained in close proximity with her, but there wasn’t much he could do about it. He wasn’t about to bail on the life he had only just begun to procure while living in New York again just because of his unrequited feelings for a girl.

Farkle knew better than to just give up like that.

Before Farkle even realized it the song was over, and Maya was suddenly back at his side, tugging Riley away from him.

“Sorry, Farks! I’m gonna dance it up with Riley and Smackle!” she shouted as they disappeared, leaving Farkle to himself. He exhausted a breath and walked over towards the open bar, ordering a heavy mixed drink so he could get through the rest of the night.

“Hey, man,” Zay appeared beside him, joining him at the bar. “How ya doin’?”

“Could be better,” Farkle shrugged. Zay nodded in agreement.

“You tell her yet?” Farkle shot him a look of confusion.

“What do you mean?” Zay only looked at him knowingly before finally answering his question.

“I _mean_ , did you tell Riley how you feel about her yet?” Farkle tried to argue, but Zay stopped him. “C’mon, Farkle. I’m not dumb. Besides, I’m one of your best friends. You can tell me anything.” Farkle crossed his arms, grunting as he took his drink, stealing a swig before responding.

“ _Fine._ You’re right, okay?! I’m in love with Riley, and I can’t tell her because it would just ruin our friendship at this point.”

“Riley wouldn’t let feelings ruin a friendship, Farkle. You know that well,” Zay pointed out. “So you should consider telling her how you feel.”

“Yeah, but I’m not going to do that because she’s never returned my feelings before. Why would she change her mind about that now?” Farkle asked, exasperated.

“I dunno, man. But I do know this: people change, and people change people. You ever consider the same thing might apply to you and Riley?”

“Damnit, Zay! Why do you have to make me deal with my problems?” Farkle groaned, rubbing at his face. Zay only offered him a small grin.

“Because somebody has to, and it sure as hell isn’t going to be you. Just consider it, okay? I want my friends to be happy, and right now _you_ are standing in the way of your own happiness. Just let go a little sometimes, Farkle. And even if you crash and burn, we’ll still be here to pick you back up. Don’t forget that.”

Zay deserted him after that, leaving Farkle to reflect on what he told him.

Maybe he was right. Farkle had been no stranger to running away from his feelings for the benefit of keeping everyone else happy. For once, he deserved a shot at making his own happiness instead of hindering it. His fear shouldn’t bar him from his desires, not this time.

He just wished the thing he wanted to obtain wasn’t the affections of Riley Matthews.

Farkle and Riley were like Icarus and the sun. The closer he got to her, the more he hurt; she was bright and enticing and all too unattainable, and his heart desired the challenge to try to be with her no matter how much pain he went through in the process. Farkle, just like Icarus, was fated to crash and burn.

 

He’d been flying too close to the sun.


	7. I Will Try Not To Breathe

After deciding to have Christmas together since Lucas and Zay were going to fly down to Texas the day after Christmas and since Smackle could only make it over for Christmas Eve and Christmas Day, Zay and Farkle offered to let everyone stay over at their loft on Christmas Eve so they could all celebrate together comfortably. Together, Farkle and Zay spent a painstakingly long amount of time decorating their house, even going as far as buying an actual tree, a plethora of multi-colored Christmas lights, and whatever they could find to make their house festive. Farkle bought some very expensive but very good hot chocolate, some eggnog, and ordered food to be delivered to their house because he was _not_ about to cook a whole Christmas meal by himself. At the end of the decorating session, Zay hung mistletoe up around the house precariously because it was his favorite holiday tradition.

Farkle knew Zay just wanted to kiss Isadora whenever he could get the chance, and he could only roll his eyes at that.

Before they knew it, Christmas Eve rolled around, and the city was lit up with excitement. Farkle made the hot chocolate while Zay turned on their faux fireplace, putting on a Christmas playlist while they waited for everyone to arrive. Zay had to leave when he got the call that Isadora was waiting at the airport, which left Farkle to tend to the house and wait for the rest of their guests. Farkle prayed that Riley wouldn’t arrive first so he didn’t have to deal with the tension of that kind of situation, but alas alack she did, and Farkle tried his best to be cool about it.

Which was hard because he was, well, you know . . . _Farkle_.

“Merry Christmas, Farkle!” Riley greeted him in a tight embrace as she walked through the door, practically tackling him to the floor.

“Merry Christmas to you, too, Riley,” he echoed back, trying to maintain his balance all the while. “Can I take your coat or bags or anything?”

“Oh, just the coat is fine. Where do you want me to put my bag?” she asked him.

“You can just set it in my room if you’d like,” he told her while he got to putting away her jacket in their coat closet. She did as she was told, in and out of the room as quick as a flash and back at his side. Farkle rolled his neck around and then waved Riley on into the kitchen so he could get her a mug of hot chocolate.

“I bet Maya and Lucas won’t be here for another hour,” Riley speculated as she toyed aimlessly with items in the kitchen until Farkle handed her a mug. “Thanks!”

“No problem. And you’re probably right. Between the two of them, they’re just the king and queen of delays,” he said as he grabbed himself a cup of hot chocolate, too.

“Delays and taking their time,” she agreed. Everything became quiet as their conversation died out and the playlist began playing a soft, slow indie cover of “Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas”. Farkle paid extra attention to his hot chocolate, focusing on _only_ drinking as much of it as he possibly could without singeing his tongue in the process. When he really couldn’t drink anymore, he set the cup on the counter, and Riley began to laugh, doing the same.

“What?” he asked, confused. She tapped the corner of her mouth.

“You’ve got chocolate on your mouth,” she giggled. Farkle tried to wipe at it but Riley shook her head, stepping closer to him. “Here, I’ve got it.”

Farkle froze in his spot as she rubbed at his mouth with her thumb until it was gone, her eyes suddenly drifting above them afterward. All Farkle could think was,

 _Shit_.

They were conveniently in a spot where Zay had hung some mistletoe, and frankly, Farkle didn’t know what to do. He knew what he _wanted_ to do, but could he ever do it? Would he ever have the guts to?

_Hell no._

But he didn’t have to, because Riley took entire control of the situation herself.

“Mistletoe,” she mumbled, her eyes twinkling from the white Christmas lights hung around on the walls. “You know what that means.”

“What does it mean?” Farkle asked coyly, as innocently as possible, but suddenly Riley shut him up by pressing her lips to the corner of his mouth, almost a real kiss but not quite, and he could feel his heart bound through his chest, almost caught in his throat. But before he could make any kind of move or response, the door swung open and he and Riley jumped apart as Maya and Lucas trudged their way through the living room, their luggage in hand.

“Merry Christmas, ya old so and sos!” Maya shouted, dropping her suitcase and letting it land on the ground with a not-so-gentle _thud_.

“Peaches!” Riley exclaimed, running up to hug her best friend. Farkle’s head was still reeling from the kind-of-kiss, but he ignored it for the sake of paying mind to literally _anything else_.

“Lucas, welcome back-ish,” Farkle greeted him, welcoming him into a hug.

“Thanks,” Lucas snorted as he broke the hug. “I love being home so that I can go somewhere else the next day.”

“Well, don’t worry about that. We’ve got all of tonight to have a good time and celebrate Christmas and relax as much as we can,” Farkle told him.

“Alright, Farkle, c’mere and give me a hug, too. Don’t go givin’ all that love to just Huckleberry here,” Maya interrupted them, pulling Farkle into a close hug.

“I missed you, Maya,” Farkle said into her hair as he hugged her back. “It’s hard being in New York without seeing you often.

“We haven’t been gone _that_ long,” Maya pointed out as she began to shrug her jacket off. “And besides, we’ll be back for New Year’s Eve and beyond.”

“I look forward to that,” Lucas added while removing his own coat.

“Where are Zay and Smackle?” Riley asked.

“Zay left to go get Isadora from the airport. They should be back soon. In the meanwhile, you guys want some hot chocolate?” Farkle offered. Lucas and Maya nodded their heads and he set off to get some as Riley and Maya and Lucas caught up on things together.

He returned not too long after with the two mugs full of hot chocolate and handed them off to Maya and Lucas, waving them over towards the couches so that they could sit down and talk instead. Farkle flicked the gas fireplace on a higher setting to warm them all up and then took a seat on the arm chair to listen in.

“Okay, you _have_ to tell us about your honeymoon!” Riley exclaimed as they all got cozy.

“Keep it PG, please,” Farkle added, knowing his friends all too well.

“Paris was _amazing_ ,” Maya said, smiling brightly. “Getting to see all the wonderful art, the wonderful food—it was the _best_ trip I’ve ever taken.”

“Agreed,” Lucas chimed in. “It’s such a beautiful city, and I loved getting to explore it with Maya. We also got to put a lock on one of the bridges.”

“You did see the Eifel Tower, right?” Riley asked.

“Of course! We were able to bring a picnic up there. It was a lovely time,” Maya answered. “And while I loved the art, I have to say that getting to taste all the French pastries and such was the best.”

“I liked all the architecture, personally. We got to visit several cathedrals that were absolutely gorgeous,” Lucas told them. “All the stained glass was just breathtaking.”

“GUESS WHO’S HERE?!” Zay shouted as he burst through the door, two suitcases in hand. Isadora walked in behind him, smirking.

“ZAY AND SMACKLE, IN THE HOUSE!!!” she yelled, her hands cupped around her mouth.

“Way to make an entrance, guys,” Farkle snorted.

“It’s the only way, really. You miss me?” Zay asked as he approached Maya and Lucas.

“Of _course_ ,” Maya told him. “Paris was really dull without you there.”

“Yeah it was! Now if you excuse me, I’m gonna go put these suitcases in my room.”

“I’ll make myself comfortable in here,” Isadora said, seating herself on the available couch. “Maya, Lucas, welcome back.”

“Thanks, Smackle. Your flight go alright?” asked Lucas.

“It went well, as per usual. Thank you for asking,” Isadora replied. “So, are we going to do presents or what? I’m here now, aren’t I?”

“ _Smackle_ ,” Lucas said pointedly, but Farkle waved him off.

“I think I speak for everyone when I say it’s time to hand out presents.”

“PRESENTS!!!” Riley shouted, her hands in the air. “Let me go get mine from my bag!”

Everyone scattered throughout the loft to retrieve the presents they had so carefully found and wrapped for each person, sitting down around the tree after gathering them. Riley bounced jubilantly next to Farkle, and even Isadora was expressing the want to open her presents as well.

“Who’s gonna start?” Zay asked as he joined them once again, the last one to complete the circle.

“Let’s start with Lucas and go around,” Maya suggested. “He can open all of his presents from us and then I can and so on. That way we can all see each other open one another’s presents.”

“Sounds good to me!” Zay agreed. “Alright Lucas, open all your gifts so we can get to me!”

Lucas did so, then Maya, Zay, Isadora, Riley, and lastly Farkle, each person excited with the gifts they received. Farkle secretly saved Riley’s present to him for last, confused when he found a jewelry box. He wasn’t much of a jewelry person, but he trusted her judgement, and when he opened it, he certainly wasn’t disappointed in the least bit.

Inside the box were two pendants, two separate necklaces, one with a resin Pluto and the other with a resin Mars.

“There’s one for you and one for me,” Riley explained, taking the Pluto necklace from the box. “I thought you might like planetary friendship necklaces. Or at least tolerate it for me. There’s also a little inscription on the back, too!”

Sure enough, Farkle flipped the Mars pendant over and inscribed in the silver backing was a quote of his in cursive:

_“You. Me. Mars. Let’s do this thing.”_

Farkle was absolutely _floored_.

“So, what do you think?” Riley asked him nervously, making him realize he hadn’t said a single word since he opened the box.

“ _God_ , Riley. I _love_ it. This is incredible!” he exclaimed, pulling her into a tight hug.

“I only want the best for my Farkle,” she whispered to him. Suddenly a cough erupted from the circle, alerting Farkle to the fact that they were not alone _at all_.

“Uh, thank you, Riley,” he cleared his throat, putting the necklace on. “And the rest of you guys, I loved all your gifts, too.”

“Gee, thanks, Farkle,” Zay quipped sarcastically. “Well, we all know we couldn’t beat Riley’s gifts. She’s the best gift-giver out there.” Riley blushed, and the rest of the group kept talking, but Farkle silently slipped off into his own world, the sounds of his friends drowned out by his own thoughts.

First the kiss, now this. Was there something Riley wasn’t telling Farkle? Maybe . . . maybe she might feel something for him, too?

Or was this just him wanting so badly for it to be something when something wasn’t really there?

Regardless, Farkle knew Riley had his heart in a headlock, for better or for worse, and she wasn’t letting go, not even for a minute.

 

//

 

The rest of the night went off without a hitch. They all stayed up late talking and watching Christmas movies, celebrating together every minute they could until one by one they became dreary, sleep calling out to them. They called it quits at two in the morning, Zay and Isadora leaving to sleep in his room, Maya and Lucas taking the pull-out couch in the living room, and Riley sleeping on an inflatable mattress in Farkle’s room while he slept on his bed.

It was really strange, having Riley in his room, so close yet so far away. It reminded him of when they were younger, when he and Riley would have sleepovers before they grew up and everything became complicated. They would stay up until the birds began to chirp, unbeknownst to their respective parents, talking about anything and everything— _Why was the sky blue? Do you think we become stars when we go? What animal would you be if you could be one?_ —all things that only Riley and Farkle could think of.

Now, though, they were much, _much_ older, and while those questions still hung in the air, sleep calls to them quicker, the ability to stay up late becoming less and less of a reality. Between the two of them, Riley was the first to fall asleep, Farkle not long afterward, trying his best to ignore the plague of thoughts inhabiting his mind.

And when he sleeps, all is peaceful, nothing making him anxious—just him and the vastness of a dream-world where anything is possible.

He didn’t get the luxury of staying asleep for long, however, because Riley woke him up abruptly and urgently, tugging on his arm to get out of bed.

_“C’mon, Farkle! I have to show you something! Get your ass out of bed already!”_

She’s lucky she’s cute.

Farkle rose groggily out of bed, not quite so pleased but not complaining. He figured that she knew what she had to show him was important, and she wouldn’t wake him up otherwise.

 _“Where are we going?”_ he yawned softly.

_“To the balcony. Get your coat on and grab a blanket and pillow.”_

He followed her instructions without a single question, putting on his heavy coat and shoes, grabbing two blankets and a pillow and exiting his room with her silently, trying his best not to wake up anyone else in the house. Riley pulled him up the stairs to where the balcony laid, closing the door gently behind her. Farkle set up the blanket on the ground along with the pillow, motioning for Riley to lie down on the ground first before joining her. Once there, he threw the blanket over them, trying to keep them as warm as he could in the New York winter air. And then they became still, the only thing interrupting the silence being the sounds of the city around them.

“Why’d you bring me out here?” Farkle asked Riley a few minutes later after staring at the night sky above.

“I just wanted to show you the sky. I mean, just look at it!” Riley exclaimed, gesturing to the stars. “All the constellations as bright as they can be, just wonderful as ever. I thought you might appreciate this on tonight of all nights,” she explained, but Farkle couldn’t help but eye her.

He knew Riley better than anyone, and something was _definitely_ up.

“Riles?”

“I have to say, Orion is one of my favorites by far. I think this is the clearest I’ve seen it in New York, too!”

 _“Riley_. _”_

Farkle finally gained her attention as she whipped her head to the side to look at him, her brown eyes shiny and as sparkling as space itself. But hidden behind those sparkles was a sadness; Farkle could see it. She was hiding something from him, something that he needed to know.

“What?” she asked, her voice barely above a whisper. Farkle reached down to find her hand, her skin numb from the cold, intertwining their fingers together.

“Tell me what’s up,” he said simply, not in a pressing manner whatsoever. Riley breathed deeply, her smile faltering and mouth opening and closing as she tried to find the words.

“Bill’s getting married,” she confessed, swallowing hard. “To a lady he’s only known a few months. You know, I always thought that he just ended up not being the marrying type, but in reality he just . . . he never wanted to be married to _me_.”

“Yeah, well, Bill’s an idiot,” Farkle told her with conviction, “He threw away a once-in-a-lifetime person, all for someone he’s known for _barely_ a few months. You’re too good for him, Riley Matthews. No one holds a candle to you.”

“Thank you, Farkle,” Riley told him, offering him a small smile. She squeezed his hand once as a sign of reassurance, then leaned in and pressed her lips against his cheek chastely before lying back down, her eyes returning to the stars above. Farkle felt his whole cheek warm up after that small kiss, and for once in his life, he decided that he needed to face his fears.

He had to tell her he loved her. Riley needed to know, and Farkle _needed_ her to know. He bore the weight of the world upon his shoulders, loving her, but that was worth it. And maybe . . . maybe she really did feel the same.

 

Farkle could only hope, after all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally found the time to write the rest of this chapter! Phew! I've been going non-stop since Christmas, but I have this chapter completed on the 27th (at the latest) as promised, and don't worry!
> 
> There's more angst to come!!! Yaaaaaaaayyyyy!!!!
> 
> Anyway, enjoy! :)


	8. There'd Be No Distance That Could Hold Us Back

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Did you ask for more angst? No? 
> 
> Whoops.

Farkle shook his jacket off his shoulders as he entered the home he hadn’t visited in quite a while, the aroma hitting him with familiarity like a ton of bricks. Granted, it was masked heavily by the scent of wassail, but it didn’t slip past Farkle one bit.

“Farkle, good to see you!” Topanga greeted him cheerfully, pulling him in for a tight embrace. Farkle smiled, hugging her back.

“It’s good to see you, too. I’ve missed you guys.”

“Farkle,” Cory interjected, holding out his own arms. “C’mere.” Farkle accepted Cory’s hug, as well, truly glad to be back to celebrate New Year’s Eve with them once again.

From the end of middle school and on, even after disaster he helped create during the first one, they held a New Year’s Eve party at Riley’s house, determined to keep up the tradition. It did get better after the first, needless to say, and so to be back again to celebrate it felt right.

“Farkle!” Auggie called out to him, a wide grin on his face. Farkle couldn’t believe how much the kid had grown up—he was almost as tall as him, and it didn’t go over his head that he was about to be eighteen very soon.

“Auggie!” Farkle smirked, high-fiving him. “How have things been for Auggie Doggie Matthews?”

“You know, senior year stuff. College. All that jazz,” Auggie shrugged. “How about you? Riley told me you were back in town permanently.”

“Yeah, I am. I have a really good engineering job and everything. California just wasn’t for me,” he admitted.

“Auggie, quit hogging Farkle! C’mon, Farkley! We’ve got games to play in my old room!” Riley appeared next to him, dragging Farkle from the living room. He waved goodbye to the rest of the Matthews’ as their daughter pulled him into her old room, shutting him inside.

“Farkle! It’s about time you made it,” Maya mumbled through a mouthful of sugar cookies.

“Ready to play some games with us?” Isadora asked him. He nodded his head, taking a seat next to her.

“Oh yeah. Bring it on!”

“Wait, let me go get your Christmas cracker!” Riley exclaimed, running out of the room and returning with a silver paper tube in hand. “Alright, pull!”

Farkle did so and it popped open, dispensing a small amount of confetti around, as well as a small little gift and a paper crown. Farkle placed the paper crown on his head before taking a look at the tiny prize, laughing when he realized what it was.

“ _Frozen_ nail polish?” he asked.

“My mom gave them away for younger children at Topanga’s, so that was one of the ones she had left. By the way, I am _totally_ painting your nails with this tonight,” Riley told him.

“Alright, enough of this. I wanna play games!” Maya shouted while leaning on Lucas for support.

“I have to agree,” Isadora said. “Please, bring on the games.”

“Okay, okay, _geez_. Game time it is then,” Riley finally gave in with a huff. She brought out Cards Against Humanity and Maya, Lucas, and Zay all cheered, ready to play. She passed out all the white cards everyone needed and set up a stack of them in the middle, along with a stack of the black cards.

“Who’s starting?” Isadora asked.

“I believe the way we decide is by whoever took a dump last,” Zay answered her. They all looked around the circle at each other until Maya plucked a black card out of the middle.

“That would be me, thank you. Feel free to fight me on this if you’d like,” she said, casually turning over the card. “Alright, here we go: What would grandma find disturbing, yet oddly charming?”

Everyone tossed a card in the middle and then Maya collected them, pushing Lucas’ face out of the way when he tried to peek.

“Alright,” Maya said after careful consideration, “What would grandma find disturbing, yet oddly charming? The card I choose is . . . GRANDMA!” she announced, tossing the card in the middle.

“YES! IN YOUR FACES!” Isadora screeched, taking the card.

And the game continued until Isadora Smackle was named the winner, and, as she claimed, “The Greatest Cards Against Humanity Champion To Ever Exist Suck It Farkle” (he had won many games in the past which frustrated her to no end). They rejoined the rest of the Matthews family after, all deciding to sit around and talk about past New Year’s resolutions and ones to come. Farkle hoped no one could sense his discomfort as he shifted in his seat, distressed by the topic at hand.

Ever since he talked to Zay at Lucas and Maya’s wedding, he couldn’t help but think he was right. Riley deserved to know the truth about his feelings for her, and after sitting with her on the balcony at Christmas, that became his New Year’s resolution: to confess to her. Farkle always did have poor timing, making New Year’s Eve a day where it was expected for him to ruin it. And when Riley stated that the new year was only five minutes away, Farkle couldn’t take it. He mentioned something about “needing air” and he took his coat and disappeared, heading toward the roof.

As he looked out amongst the city all lit up, everyone ready to celebrate another new beginning, Farkle gripped the metal rail encasing the roof, his head reeling.

_He could do this. He was going to tell Riley how he felt, and everything was going to be okay—_

“Farkle? What are you doing up here? Everyone became worried when you just rushed off out of nowhere.”

Riley managed to find him on the roof, both lucky and unlucky for him. She always did have a sixth sense for locating Farkle wherever he was, and he couldn’t fault her for that.

“I didn’t think you would find me up here,” he told her honestly, turning around to face her.

“Of course I’d find you. I’ll _always_ find you, Farkle Minkus,” she smiled as she met him face-to-face, sparing them only a couple inches of space. “You’re my best friend, remember?”

“Yeah, of course I do,” he breathed, his heart rate increasing with each passing second. He swallowed back every resignation he was holding onto, tampering down his own fear for once.

“Then what’s the matter? You’ve been dodgy all-night long. Tell me, Farkle. _Please_. Best friends don’t keep secrets from each other.” As his mouth gaped open to answer, the city called out below, the countdown becoming clear as bells.

 

_“Ten!”_

 

He could do this.

 

_“Nine!”_

 

He’s _got this_.

 

_“Eight!”_

 

It was fine, really.

 

_“Seven!”_

 

He was just going to tell the girl he loved that he was in love with her.

 

_“Six!”_

 

Farkle Minkus was in love with Riley Matthews.

 

_“Five!”_

 

Everything would be alright.

 

_“Four!”_

 

There was nothing stopping him.

 

_“Three!”_

 

He just had to come out and say it.

 

_“Two!”_

 

Right about . . .

 

 _“One!”_  

 

Now.

 

_“HAPPY NEW YEAR!”_

 

“Happy New Year, Farkle!”

“Riley, I’m in love with you.”

 

As the city below them celebrated, the rooftop became eerily quiet as Riley gazed at Farkle with those bright, wide eyes of hers, mouth hanging open but no words leaving it. Farkle couldn’t tell what she was thinking, not at all, and he felt his heart begin to drop into his stomach, his anxieties returning to him all at once.

“. . . _Riley?_ ” he asked so softly, so full of fear that he couldn’t recognize his own voice.

“Farkle, I don’t understand,” she finally answered him, her brow furrowed so intensely he was almost afraid her face was going to remain stuck like that. Farkle sighed before explaining it all to her.

“Riley, I’m done pretending that my feelings for you were nothing more than platonic. It became easy to ignore them when I was with Isadora because I truly loved her, but after we broke up, it was like it all came back to me again. But then we ended up going to different colleges and I went away to California for a while, so I hid them again and didn’t tell you all those times we talked that they still existed because I was scared that you would reject me and not want to remain close to me anymore. When I moved back again, those feelings became stronger and I couldn’t ignore them anymore, and I thought I owed you the truth.”

The way Riley stared back at him killed Farkle, and he watched as tears began to drip down her face, her lip trembling. He reached out to wipe them away but she jerked back in response, which only hurt him more in the process.

“I don’t . . . I don’t want us to change, Farkle. We’re so good the way we are. Can’t we just leave it at that?” she sobbed. Farkle rubbed his hand on his face, shaking his head.

“You know I can’t do that, Riley. These are years upon years of feelings that I’ve held for you. They won’t just disappear in one night. I can’t forget them and move on like nothing happened.”

“Why not?” He scoffed in disbelief.

“Riley, you will always be my sun, my everything. You make my day brighter just by existing. How can I just ignore that? I don’t think I’ll be able to look at you for a long while without feeling an overwhelming pain inside my chest. You’re my best friend in the whole world and that will never not be true, but I can’t just let everything I feel for you go. It’s . . . it’s too _hard_.”

“Then _try_ ,” she urged, but Farkle just looked up, his eyes stinging with tears.

“ _Riley_.”

He could tell she was trying her best to suppress the tears falling from her face to no avail. Farkle could almost say he was having the same problem. He offered her a small, sad grin, breathing heavily as he tried to think of anything else to say, but words were lost on him at this point. So he waved goodbye to her instead, for, sadly, the foreseeable future.

And as he walked away, his fingertips grazed his cheeks, realizing that he had been crying with her for a long while. He willfully ignored the tears, stuffing his hands into his coat pockets as he disappeared down the stairs.

 

_Fuck New Year’s._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There's more writing in the works, and I have the next chapter completed, but I'm going to hold off on it until I have more if not the rest of this fic written. But I've got it all planned out, so that shouldn't be too hard to do!
> 
> As always, thank you for reading! :)


	9. And Ain't It Lonely, Livin' All The Time

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, so here's a new update! It hasn't been too long since I posted the last chapter, but I've heard people are dying for an update, so no worries. I just finished writing the rest of the fic, so there will be more updates soon after this, as well. I hope you all enjoy!
> 
> Also, go check out my playlist for this fic at (https://8tracks.com/bella-m-10209/there-goes-our-love-again)! Each song correlates with each chapter, aka where each chapter got its title from. So yeah :)

Farkle couldn’t deny the fact that life without Riley Matthews had become difficult. It was hard for him to adjust to life without her presence a constant, and he had to remind himself continuously that it was for both his and Riley’s own good.

Riley didn’t deserve to have her best friend be unbearably in love with her while she didn’t reciprocate those feelings.

But even though he placed a palpable amount of distance between them, he was still being tortured by her, no matter how hard he tried to escape it. That night on the roof played over and over again in his mind, even making its way to haunt his dreams.

He could only see her cry so many times before he suffocated.

When Farkle wasn’t working, he laid in bed pitifully, binge-watching _The X-Files_ and pretending like he didn’t exist. He fell into that pattern for the entire month of January until Zay decided enough was enough.

“Alright, Minkus, I’m sick of your dumb wallowing shit. Get up out of bed already, we’re going on a jog,” Zay told Farkle one Saturday morning late in January, waking him up by throwing a pair of shoes in his face.

“A jog?” Farkle muttered groggily, trying his best to sit up in bed.

“Yup! And no complaining about it! Now get a move on before I drag you outside in your pajamas and make you do it,” Zay threatened before disappearing behind his bedroom door, shutting it abruptly.

Farkle groaned but did as he was told, changing into the gym clothes he had packed away in the back of his dresser. He made sure to layer up as well since it was January in New York and cold as sin.

As soon as he left his room, Zay ushered him out the door of their loft, making sure to lock it before they went out on their jog.

When they hit the sidewalk, Zay started off what he assumed was slow, but when he looked back at Farkle, that was not the case. Farkle was _extremely_ slow, shooting Zay a very vicious look as he tried desperately to keep up. Zay rolled his eyes and slowed down for him, almost at what was a fast-walk to him.

“Geez, Farkle, when was the last time you went on a jog?” he asked him.

“I don’t do jogs, Zay. I went to the gym a lot when I was in California, but I _hate_ jogs,” Farkle answered. Zay shrugged as they took a right on a corner.

“Well, we’re out on one now, and you agreed to it, so now you get to listen to me talk to you.”

“Great, a talk,” Farkle mumbled sarcastically, to which Zay punched him on the arm in response.

“Oh no, you do _not_ get to pull that on me, Minkus. I gave you almost the entire month to pick your sorry ass up out of bed and do something, but you just stayed there all sad and sorrowful about your life. So now I get to yell at you for the next however many minutes, and you’re going to shut up and listen to me, got it?” Farkle nodded his head, afraid of what Zay might do if he opened his mouth. Zay sighed, preparing himself for the long rant he was about to deliver.

“So Riley doesn’t return your feelings and _yeah_ , you’re giving her space, which is great. But you don’t get to keep being sad about it. Feelings aren’t going to go away if you sit there in misery, alright? What you do is you buck up, try some new things, and _move on_. Love sucks and is shit, but you’ve gotta be the one to pick yourself back up, or you’ll be stuck in love with her forever.”

Farkle remained quiet for a long while after Zay told him that, considering all of what he said.

He was right, of course—he couldn’t just sit in bed all day anymore. Farkle had to get up and try to fix his life himself, and _sure_ , it was going to be different, but it had to be done. But he was having trouble with pushing himself in that direction, mainly because he had taken a shot in the dark when he confessed his feelings to Riley, but when he looked over it all, it didn’t make sense.

Farkle thought back to Christmas, and not only Christmas, but all other interactions he ever had with Riley. There was no way he was alone in all this—sure, Riley was a very touchy-feely person, and sure, he didn’t quite echo that same level of affection, at least to the degree that she did. But every time Riley was around Farkle since he returned, maybe even before he had left New York in the first place, she had to ensure that she was touching him in some way—perhaps snuggled against him on a couch, leaning up against him in a restaurant, pressing a kiss to his cheek when he had done something she appreciated.

People . . . people didn’t act that way around people they considered to be “just a friend”. _Riley Matthews_ didn’t act that way around people she considered to be “just a friend”. Farkle had known her far too long, understood her signs and tells.

Those were all tells, or so he _thought_.

Maybe it was wishful thinking. Maybe he interpreted those interactions as tells because he wanted it to be real _so badly_. As a general rule, though, Farkle didn’t let emotions control his entire being if he could help it.

Even if he thought she returned those feelings, her answer to him had been “No”, so he couldn’t argue further. Farkle had to move on, because otherwise it would kill him.

“You’re right, Zay. I . . . I need to actively move on. But you have to help me, because I don’t know _how_ ,” Farkle admitted, his brow furrowed as he bit at his chapped lips.

“I can help you do that, buddy. Just know it’ll take a bit of time,” Zay warned.

“I know, but I’m willing to wait for it. Besides, it can’t get any worse at this point,” Farkle pointed out.

“True dat,” Zay agreed, and as they kept jogging down the streets of New York, Farkle felt his standing in New York shift a bit back into place, the mess he was in starting to untangle little by little, the light at the end of the tunnel becoming clearer once again.


	10. I Don't Wanna Wake Up Lonely, I Don't Wanna Just Be Fine

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am tired and I have to return to my university several hours from now so here's a chapter update love you all thanks for reading <3

Farkle sighed as he stood in front of his mirror, fixing his tie that came attached with the suit his parents had sent over as a birthday gift.

 _Nothing cooler than spending your birthday night with your parents,_ he thought sarcastically.

It wasn’t that he didn’t love Stuart and Jennifer dearly. It was that he wished he could spend time with all his friends, but that had all become iffy since . . .

_Yeah._

And his parents offered to buy him dinner at his favorite restaurant anyway, so he didn’t want to say no to that. He needed to visit them a little more often now that he had returned, anyway, and his birthday dinner was the perfect time to catch up with them for real.

He met them at seven in the evening on the dot at The Bamboo Elephant, giving his mother a kiss on the cheek and his father a warm hug before they entered the restaurant together. They all sat at their specially reserved table by the huge aquarium that Farkle had always loved so much, handing over a pile of presents for him to open after they had ordered.

“So, how’s the engineer life, Farkle?” Stuart asked him as he sifted through the menu.

“Pretty good. It’s work, but I like what I do. Being in the biomedical branch is my favorite,” Farkle answered.

“I’m glad. I must say, I was fairly sad that you didn’t want to work for my company, but I know you work hard and that you like what you do, so I’m not too upset. Biomedical engineering needs a Farkle Minkus to help them, that’s for sure,” his father smiled. “What about your friends? How are they all?” Farkle shifted in his seat uncomfortably.

“They’re good, as well. Zay’s been doing well at his job he’s had for the last few months, and he’s doing well with Isadora. The married life has been treating Maya and Lucas well, which is nice.”

“And Riley?” Farkle knew he couldn’t escape that one.

“She’s . . . she’s fine.” His father raised an eyebrow at that.

“Is everything okay with you two? The two of you have always been thicker than thieves,” Jennifer pointed out.

“Yeah, it’s fine. We’ve just been . . . busy. Really busy,” Farkle tried to sway the conversation in a different direction, but his parents had always been keen to when he was struggling with something, and they weren’t about to drop the topic.

“ _Farkle_ ,” his father pressed. Farkle sighed.

“We’re not okay, alright? I haven’t talked to her in over a month.”

“What, did you tell her you were in love with her or something?” his mother asked. Farkle’s steel-blue eyes shot wide open.

“Oh, Farkle, we’re your parents. We _know_ you,” Stuart told him. “So you told her you loved her, and she didn’t reciprocate it?”

“I . . . _no_ ,” Farkle replied, tugging at his collar. “Can we _not_ talk about this?”

“Farkle, we just want you to be happy, that’s all. Oh, Stuart, this is actually the perfect opportunity to bring up that _thing_ we were talking about,” Jennifer said, and Stuart caught on quickly.

“Oh. Yes! Farkle, I know this is probably not a conversation you want to have with your parents, but I think that your mother is right, and this could be the thing to get you out of your funk. So, there’s this woman at work around your age, and she’s very smart and—”

 _“Dad!!”_ Farkle exclaimed.

“Please just hear me out, Farkle. You don’t even know if this would be bad! Her name is Naomi Blackett, and she’s one of my top workers at my company. She’s incredibly smart and reminds me a lot of you. I think you should go out with her at least _once_ , just to see if the two of you hit it off.”

“Farkle, we really think this could be good for you,” his mother pleaded, and Farkle knew he had been worn down. They were only just going to continue prodding and prodding until he had agreed to it anyways, and it was just a date. What would be the harm?

“Alright, alright. I’ll go on a date with her. Let’s just agree though that you will _never ever ever_ do this again, okay? I’m plenty capable of finding dates for myself, thank you very much,” Farkle grumbled, embarrassed.

 _Nothing like having your parents set you up with a stranger on your freaking birthday to make you feel like a confident, independent adult_.

“Great! You know, it’s not too unsurprising that it didn’t work out between you and Riley. I mean, I was after Topanga for the longest time and see how that worked out for me,” his father said, to which his mother smacked him on the arm. “ _Relax_ , I’m happy! I’m just saying, perhaps it’s for the best. I am sorry, though, Farkle. For what it’s worth, I always thought the two of you would get together eventually.”

Oh good. Even his parents had a vote of confidence for their doomed relationship. Farkle really could just curl up and die right inside the restaurant—he’d be fine with that.

“Like I said, can we just _not_? I think I’d rather just think about what food I want right now, okay?”

“Of course, Farkle. We love you, you know that, right?” his mother grinned warmly at him. Farkle nodded his head.

“Yes, I do. I love you, too, Mom and Dad. I am really happy that I get to spend my birthday dinner with you guys. We haven’t had much time to catch up since I got back from California.”

“No, we haven’t, have we? I’m glad we get to have you near us again.”

“Me as well. I missed my son,” Stuart smirked at Farkle across the table.

“Don’t go getting soft on me now, you guys,” Farkle teased back, truly enjoying being around his parents despite the fact that they were trying to set him up with someone.

God, did he really look that desperate?! Was this his parents’ way of telling him he was supposed to be getting married right about now? Farkle never was one to follow the status quo, and it still seemed like marriage was far in the future for him.

Why did he even care, though? They weren’t talking about marriage, for Christ’s sake! It was just one little dumb blind date with someone who worked for his father.

Nothing was going to come out of it, Farkle was _certain_.


	11. Bad News, Baby I'm Bad News

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey!! So sorry I've been MIA recently I just started school up again and had a family thing come up so my life has been preoccupied, but here's another chapter!!!! :)
> 
> Also, I apologize for the chapter :/

Farkle was nervous despite the fact that he didn’t think the date was going to go anywhere. A date was a date, though, and he hadn’t gone on one of those in a _long_ time. Plus, his heart was still on the mend since the love of his life told him she didn’t feel the same way despite the fact that he was certain she was in love with him, too.

Whatever. Farkle didn’t need to focus on  _that_ , anyway. He was trying to get over it, wasn’t he? This date could be good for that, no matter which direction it ended up at.

Still, he wished she would just arrive already so he wasn’t constantly drumming on the table looking like a dateless idiot who got stood up by a supposedly great girl.

“Oh my gosh, I’m so sorry I’m late! I got stuck in horrendous traffic after I got out of work,” a girl suddenly appeared at his table, taking the empty seat across from him. She was very pretty, Farkle couldn’t deny that—long, billowy black hair, bronze skin, hazel eyes indicated so.

“It’s okay, I’ve just been holding this table hostage while I waited,” Farkle cringed at his own attempt at humor, but she— _Naomi_ —didn’t seem to think the same thing. She laughed instead, her laughter a pleasant, soft tinkle.

“By the way, I know your dad mentioned me, but we haven’t formally met. I’m Naomi Blackett,” Naomi stretched her hand out to him across the table, smiling bright. Farkle took her hand and shook it.

“Farkle Minkus, son of the one and only Stuart Minkus. You can laugh; I know it’s an unfortunate name,” he said as he introduced himself the way he normally did, awaiting the response his name usually got him. And he waited and waited, but her laughter never came.

“I don’t think Farkle is an unfortunate name,” Naomi told him. “I think it’s a unique name for a unique person.” He couldn’t help but blush at that, but he hid his embarrassment, raising up the menu to scan it desperately for reprieve.

“Oh, you can order whatever you want. I’ll pay,” Farkle offered, but Naomi shook her head.

“I didn’t get where I am today by letting other people take care of things for me. I think it’s only fair that we split the check, don’t you think? That way it’ll be equal.”

“That sounds fair to me.”

Although Farkle really wanted to hate this date with Naomi, he couldn’t find it in himself to really dislike it. Naomi was pleasant and nice and he liked being around her even though he had only been sitting with her and talking for barely a few minutes.

He didn’t know what that meant exactly, but he didn’t want to think. He’d done too much thinking lately.

“So, you obviously know what I do. What do you do, Farkle Minkus?” Naomi asked him after the waiter had arrived and they had ordered their meals.

“I’m a biomedical engineer. Basically we just make medical machines better and sort of help health care improve little by little,” Farkle explained. “It doesn’t sound to interesting, but I like it.”

“What do you mean that doesn’t sound interesting? I think that’s so cool!” Naomi exclaimed. “Don’t sell yourself short, Farkle. You love what you do, so own it.”

“Yeah, I guess you’re right. I mean, I water a lot of things down in my life because other people find it boring too often, but maybe I shouldn’t worry about that.”

“Farkle,” Naomi said his name, covering his hand with her own gently, “You deserve to have good things in life. Don’t let yourself forget that, okay?”

Farkle smiled at her for the first time, genuinely smiled at her, and it really did occur to him that maybe he should let whatever was happening just happen. He’d been stuck in his own head too much lately, had been worried too often about how terrible his life seemed to be going. But Naomi was a light entering his life, trying to show him that his world could still be good if he would only let it.

And he didn’t let himself worry for the rest of the night, not at all. He let himself enjoy being around Naomi, and at the end of the night they had made it back to his apartment (luckily free of Zay), and as he held her and kissed her, he felt his heart settle for the first time in a long while. She was good, and Farkle deserved good. He let himself have this because Naomi was a relief in his life, a band-aid to his wound.

She kissed his neck and he moaned, and when he guided her towards his bed, he laid her down carefully like he was going to break her if he didn’t, making sure to pay attention to every single part of her.

 _Deserve, deserve, deserve. I deserve to be happy. I deserve to love,_ he repeated the mantra in his head with every press of his lips to her skin.

When they were finished, she curled into him, surrounding him in a comfortable warmth that he wanted to bask in forever, allowing sleep to reach him quickly, his mind a blank for the first time in a long while.

And as he closed his eyes, he didn’t even think about brown eyes that sparkled like the cosmos and a smile that made his heart beat like a kickdrum.

Nope. Not at all.


	12. Fall Back Into Place

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is my favorite chapter I wrote for this, for sure. I hope you guys enjoy it just as much!! :)

“Do you _have_ to leave?”

“I’ve got to meet Maya for lunch. You know that,” Farkle told Naomi as he pulled on his boots, tying them securely. “You know, you _will_ have to meet my friends at some point.”

“I know, I know,” she sighed in her bed next to him. “I just—I like the bubble. I like us just being _us_ right now.” He smiled at her, reaching over to grab her hand, pressing his lips to her knuckles.

“I feel the same way. I’m just going to get a headache if I have to hear Zay badger me about it again,” Farkle rolled his eyes. “Anyway, I’ve gotta get going. See you later?” Naomi nodded her head at him, grinning as he gave her a chaste peck on the lips before grabbing his wallet, phone, and keys off her nightstand.

“Bye!” she waved to him as he exited the room and then her front door, turning on his phone to check it once he hit the hallway. His phone vibrated immediately, alerting him to a barrage of texts from Maya.

 

**Maya ♥: Farkle**

**Maya ♥: Faaaaaaaaarkleeeeeeeee**

**Maya ♥: DOCTOR FARKLESTEIN**

**Maya ♥: Whatever you’re doing better be good since you’re obviously IGNORING ME**

**Maya ♥: You’re lame Minkus!!!**

Farkle snorted, typing out a quick response.

 

**Farkle: Why do you beckon me so, Maya?**

**. . .**

**Maya ♥: FINALLY**

**Maya ♥: What took you so damn long?**

**Farkle: I was otherwise preoccupied**

**Farkle: But I’m on my way to meet you now, no worries!**

**Maya ♥: That’s fine and dandy, but I was just going to tell you to meet me at my apartment.**

**Maya ♥: I got held up and need to do something in the house before we go**

**Maya ♥: So just get your ass over here and quite ignoring me!**

**Farkle: Yes ma’am!**

Farkle stuck his phone back into his pocket and hailed a taxi once he got to the sidewalk. He got in and told the driver Maya’s address, playing mindlessly with his phone and looking out the window until he arrived.

The sun’s rays billowed over the city, cascading it in a halo of light. Farkle was glad the weather was changing—not quite as cold as it had been the month prior, but still cold enough that he had to wear one of his fleece hoodies while he was out. His leg bobbed up and down—it had been one of his nervous habits ever since he could remember. He had reason to be anxious, too, even though he was just meeting up with Maya; she told him they had to talk, which was why they planned to meet up for lunch.

No matter what, whenever someone said they had to “talk”, it _never_ meant anything good. That was a rule of thumb, for sure.

The taxi finally paused when they reached Maya and Lucas’ apartment complex and Farkle handed the man a five-dollar bill and then exited the cab, shutting the door and walking up to the front doors of the building. At the panel by the door, he hit the button to apartment number 305, the buzzer going off right away.

 _“Come on up!”_ Maya’s voice came from the intercom, the doors allowing him entrance inside. He walked in and up a few flights of stairs until he reached her floor, making a beeline for the right side until he found apartment 305. He knocked on the door and Maya answered it, appearing to him at once, pretty as ever.

“Hey! Come on inside!” she waved him in quickly, closing the door behind him. “Can you do me a favor and wait on the balcony? I know it’s a weird request, but don’t ask,” she added. Farkle shrugged his shoulders.

“Yeah, of course. _Weirdo_ ,” he added under his breath as he made his way to the balcony, making sure it was loud enough for Maya to hear it.

“I heard that! Quit sassing me, Minkus!” she shouted, but Farkle only laughed, taking a step onto the balcony and shutting the door behind him. And when he stepped out there, he realized just exactly _why_ Maya had insisted they “talk”, why Maya made him come over to her house before, why Maya had him wait on the balcony. And judging by his counterpart’s expression, she had been bamboozled, as well.

“Farkle?” Riley called out to him when she noticed he was there. She had been waiting patiently by the brick enclosure surrounding the balcony, looking over the city. The slight breeze the weather had promised played at the locks of her hair, which had been cropped short recently by the looks of it.

 _“Riley,”_ he said breathlessly, his fight-or-flight response kicking in heavily. He reached towards the doorknob to see if he could escape, but it was no use. Maya was already standing by the glass of the door, shaking her head.

She locked it.

Farkle turned back toward Riley, sighing heavily as he stuffed his hands into his pockets, trying his best to maintain as little eye-contact with her as possible.

“. . . You cut your hair,” he said, pointing to her new bob. She nodded slightly, just as shy to interact as he was as she tucked a strand behind her ear.

“Yeah. I thought I needed a change,” she told Farkle, hugging her arms against her chest. She was wearing a spaghetti-strap dress and he figured she must have left her own jacket inside. He slid out of his own and offered it over, not bothering to take no for an answer. Riley grabbed it gently from him, offering a soft, _“Thank you,”_ in return as she pulled it over herself, embracing the warmth it gave her once it was on.

They stood there quietly again, Farkle joining her by the brick fence to look out over the city. As the rush of cars bustled below and the wind blew in and out of existence, Farkle couldn’t ever remember feeling younger than he did in this moment.

It was easy to forget that they were much older now, after being friends for practically their entire lives. It was like the world around them grew, but they were still those two young kids at that Halloween party, and he was quickly there at her side to rescue her.

He guessed he was doomed from the first day he met her.

“Farkle,” Riley interrupted their bout of silence, turning to face him. There was a hesitancy in her gaze that he couldn’t fault her for, but so much of it he really couldn’t read, and that frightened him. “I’m sorry.” Farkle was floored.

She was _sorry?_ What did she have to be sorry for? He was the one that fucked everything up!

 _“Riley,”_ he pressed, “What in the world are you sorry for?”

“I’m sorry I didn’t get into contact with you, it’s just . . . I didn’t know how to deal, and you said you wanted time apart and I thought . . . I miss you,” she blurted out. “I miss my best friend so much.”

“Riley, this isn’t your fault, it’s mine. I could’ve contacted you, too, I was just—”

“Scared?” Riley finished the thought for him. Farkle nodded.

“I thought I ruined everything. I miss you, too, more than anything. My life is terrible without you in it.” Riley eyed him a moment before a sly smile played at the corner of her mouth, her expression coy.

“You still have your necklace I gave you back at Christmas?” she asked.

“Duh, you dork,” Farkle rolled his eyes, tugging the chain out from under his shirt. “I haven’t taken this damn thing off since the moment you gave it to me.”

“I had to check!” she said before pulling her own out from underneath the sweatshirt. “I got these made for us because we’re Mars and Pluto, the two best planets out there and the two best _friends_ out there. I don’t want you to think anything could ever change that, okay? You’re my best friend until the end, no stipulations required. I need you in my life just as much.” Farkle smiled at her.

“I _guess_ that makes sense,” he teased, earning a light punch on the arm from Riley.

“Alright, Farkley, I think you can make up all this time apart to me. You want to grab dinner tonight?” she asked. Farkle stopped a moment, biting his tongue on accident.

 _“Merde,”_ he muttered under his breath before telling her, “Actually, I can’t.”

“Can’t?” she tilted her head at him. Farkle breathed, realizing he had to tell her the thing he wasn't sure he wanted to tell her at all.

“Uh, yeah. I have a girlfriend now,” he explained quickly, adding, “And I promised I’d have dinner with her tonight.” Riley fell silent again, and he tried his best to gauge her reaction. He almost thought he saw something, a hint of . . . shock, maybe? But it disappeared in a flash, her expression settling as she grinned at him, only slight.

“That’s okay, we can have dinner another night,” she rebounded. “But you’re going to have to introduce us at some point, mister,” she poked him in the arm.

“Can do. You’re not the only one who’s been bugging me about it.”

“And . . . I have a better way you can make it up to me.”

“What’s that?” Farkle wondered.

“Bill invited me to his wedding, and as stupid as it was of me, I said yes. But I knew I couldn’t alone, so I added a “plus one” to my R.S.V.P., and I was going to ask Maya, but I’d rather have you be my plus one, if that’s alright. Can you do it?” Farkle understood how hard it was for her to go through this, watching her ex get married so soon after dumping her after three years of commitment. He very well couldn’t say no to her.

Not that he wanted to.

“Of course, Riley. I’d be honored to accompany you to his trash wedding,” he winked at her. Riley snorted.

“I’m glad to have the solidarity. Now do you want to see if Maya will let us off her balcony?” she offered her arm. Farkle looped his arm with hers, joining her.

“I happily oblige,” he answered, ecstatic to have his best friend back in his life once again.


	13. I Couldn't Leave If I Wanted To 'Cause Something Keeps Pulling Me Back To You

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I haven't forgotten about this fic, I swear! School just has me busy is all. But no worries, and here's the next chapter!
> 
> Enjoy! :)

Farkle wondered to himself just how many times within a six-month period he was going to have to put on a suit. It wasn’t that he minded wearing them, it was just he couldn’t believe how often he was having to pull suits out of his closet.

As he finished buttoning up his black suit jacket, he stepped into the bathroom to grab some hair gel from the sink drawer, styling his hair into a perfect quaff before stepping back to examine himself and check if everything was perfect. His phone buzzed in his pocket and he took it out, checking to see who sent him a text.

 

**Pluto: You ready yet, Minkus?**

**Pluto: I’ve got an impression to make.**

Farkle chuckled softly to himself as he typed out a response, sending it as fast as possible.

 

**Mars: I was BORN ready. Didn’t you know?**

**. . .**

**Pluto: You’re a dork, you know that?**

**Pluto: Get your butt moving already and pick me up!!**

Farkle slipped the phone back into his pocket, flipping the switch off in his bathroom and heading to his nightstand to pick up his keys and wallet, as well. He left his room and gave Zay a small nod of acknowledgement before heading out the door to hail a taxi.

Riley lived not too far from him, luckily enough, but their drive to the wedding was going to be a bit of a long one since it was about forty-five minutes out of the way. Farkle climbed into the cab that drove up in front of him, feeding the driver Riley’s apartment address and the address of the wedding, texting Riley afterward to let her know he was going to be there shortly.

 

**Mars: Alright I’m headed your way.**

**Mars: Which, if you didn’t know, translates directly to:**

**Mars: RILEY YOU BETTER HAVE YOUR BUTT WAITING ON THAT CORNER CURB OR WE’RE GOING TO HAVE SOME WORDS**

**. . .**

**Pluto: Relax, Farkle. I was born ready, didn’t you know?**

He snorted and exited out of his messaging app, playing solitaire in the few minutes of solace he had before arriving at Riley’s neck of the woods. Farkle played through a couple of games before the car came to an abrupt stop, the door opening immediately.

“Took you long enough,” Riley quipped as she slid in next to Farkle, her perfume hitting his nose almost instantaneously. He glanced over at her to see her dress—a mid-thigh length purple tulle dress, the bodice decorated with an ornate lace pattern of stars, little gem stones placed carefully here and there to give it a delicate glisten. She had on black satin heels to pair with the dress, ribbon crossing and then tying off below on each calf. Her makeup was sparkly as well, and Farkle raised his brow.

“Extra much?” he asked. Riley stuck out her tongue, crossing her arms against her chest.

“I _told_ you. I’ve got an impression to make.”

“The impression being . . . ?”

“That my life is much better without Bill in it and he’s a sucky idiot who’s doomed to fail in life,” she told him, sticking her nose in the air. Farkle chuckled, shaking his head.

“That’s quite the impression,” he said, “But it works.”

Farkle and Riley switched off between chatting amiably and staring out the window as the taxi drove them away towards their destination. It was a clear day out, and Farkle was grateful for that. He’d known quite a few years where the weather had turned absolutely stormy, making the days drab and essentially unmanageable for almost an entire month. It was also better for Riley’s sake that it was sunny—the weather had a habit of affecting her, and on this day of all days she needed to be kept positive. He didn’t need her to tell him that to know; he just read between the lines and understood.

After their long drive, the house the wedding and reception was being held at came into view, the taxi coming to a slow stop as it reached its destination. Farkle paid the cab driver and he and Riley stepped out of the car, thanking the man before closing their doors and making their way up to the back of the house where rows of chairs had been set up, the majority of the guests having already arrived.

“Very classy. I’m really loving these folding chairs they painted to look rustic to cover up the fact that they are shitty folding chairs,” Riley muttered to Farkle as they took a seat in the back row. Farkle bit his cheeks to contain the laughter bubbling up inside him, trying desperately not to piss off people who were _actually_ there to attend the wedding rather than show up to prove a point.

The wedding décor was really, _really_ bad though, which made it even harder for Farkle to not break out into a fit of laughter.

“Oh come on, Riley,” Farkle said as they sat down, “They obviously put a lot of time into making this the perfect Pinterest wedding.” Riley snickered, covering her mouth with her hand to stifle it.

 _“Stop,”_ she implored, but he knew they were just going to spend the rest of the wedding egging each other on. “When do we get access to the open bar? I’m ready to get drunk because I don’t think I can get through this wedding sober.”

“Unfortunately for you, that is long, _long_ down the road from now. We still have to get through this godawful ceremony,” Farkle told her.

“Godawful? Farkle, that’s awfully mean. I mean, there are so many redeeming qualities about this wedding. Or did you miss the “Pick a seat, not a side!” board on the way in?” They both let out a loud cackle which caused several of the attendees to turn around and shoot them some severely nasty looks, forcing Riley and Farkle to have to shut up immediately. Luckily for them, the music started up, alerting them to the beginning of the wedding.

Farkle watched Riley tense up as the groom, her ex-boyfriend Bill, sauntered up the aisle to wait at the front for his bride-to-be. He reached over and took Riley's hand in his, squeezing it once for reassurance. She looked over at him and offered a half-hearted smile, one that held a sort of sadness he would never be able to comprehend himself. But he was there for her, always would be, and that was enough.

After the bridesmaids and groomsmen filed in not long after, the flower girl entering to toss some petals as the bride came down the aisle, her father on her arm. Farkle looked at Riley to gauge her reaction, which was next to impossible—she sat still, her eyes fixated on the events taking place, but her expression blank as a slate. He made sure to keep an eye on her during the entirety of the ceremony, but he could only do so much when she was suppressing her emotions like she was.

And then the longest ceremony in the history of forever transpired, and Farkle could feel himself slipping into a solipsistic coma in the process.

 _“God, this is taking **forever** ,” _Riley groaned next to him.

 _“It’s like, we get it! You’re married! Move on already!”_ he whispered back.

Eventually, the ceremony did end, and when the priest announced, “You may kiss the bride”, Farkle and Riley clapped and cheered the most out of everyone for the sheer fact that it had finally ended. The bride and groom then invited everyone to sit in the tent they had set up for the reception while the wedding party took pictures, and they gladly got up and left as quick as they could.

“So, how do you feel about all this?” Farkle asked Riley casually as they found their designated seats. Riley shrugged.

“I don’t know how to feel about it, quite honestly. But I do know that I did _not_ miss out on a killer wedding. If this was on Yelp, I’d give it 2 stars for “needs improvement” and “is a sad excuse for a wedding”.”

“You’re not wrong,” he agreed. “By the way, I just spotted the table where they’re asking for our best date ideas. Are you thinking what I’m thinking?” The corners of Riley’s eyes crinkled as a mischievous grin spread across her face.

“Oh, _definitely_.”

The two of them got up from the table immediately and ran over to where the “Date Jar” was, grabbing as many pieces of paper as they could to scrawl out _horrible_ date ideas.

“I put, _‘Go to Chuck E. Cheese’s for a romantic date and share a slice of pizza’_ ,” Riley announced.

“That’s a good one. I put, _‘Have her check out Uranus for spots’_ ,” Farkle told her. They both fell into a fit of laughter, one that caused Farkle’s ribs to hurt and Riley to cry from laughing so much. They stuffed the jar with a few more “choice” dates before going back to their table to recover from their incessant cackling.

The rest of the whole wedding process went just about as slow and tedious as the ceremony was. The picture-taking session endured for an entire hour, then the first dance of the bride and groom commenced as soon as they entered, followed by the longest toasting session ever that made Farkle want to claw his eyes out. When they came to a final close, they raised their glasses and then told everyone to get food and dance, which was the biggest relief ever in Farkle’s life. He was hungrier than ever—out of boredom or pure hunger he had no idea—and he and Riley remained quiet while they scarfed down the meals they had grabbed as soon as they were given the okay to go.

When their plates were cleaned and they were unbelievably famished, they headed to the bar to grab some drinks—hard liquor, in Riley’s case—so that they could get trashed as ever to get through the last part of the wedding. And, like back at Halloween, they were both quick to get wasted, and Farkle sensed himself get lighter and feel bubblier as the night progressed.

Riley seemed pleased with the added alcohol to her system as she took to the dance floor, even managing to pull random strangers in to dance with. Farkle whisked her away when she made the mistake of dancing with Bill’s mother, who was clearly confused as to why her son’s ex was at the wedding. The song began to slow down and Riley giggled as Farkle twirled her around, trying his best to keep her distracted from doing anything else she’d probably regret later.

“Farkley,” Riley’s laughter bubbled in her throat, “Dance with me!” He snorted, obliging as he slowed her down to the pace of the song, his hands on her waist and hers gripping his arms for balance. His presence, along with the unhurried tempo of the song, appeared to have settled her down, sobering her up just a tad so that her expression turned serious. Farkle couldn’t help but notice how the world around them also seemed to pause, as well, making it feel like they were the only people in the world.

“I know it doesn’t look that way,” Riley said, “But I don’t think I mind Bill getting married. I think . . . I think I’m okay. I thought I was going to be upset, but coming here really solidified the fact that I’m over him completely. Thank you so much for coming here with me and helping me get through this. I love you, Farkle.”

When Riley’s eyes finally met his, Farkle was taken aback—she was looking at him in a way that she had never done when completely sober, but was still wholly Riley. It was an indescribable emotion, the way her smile curled into her cheeks, soft and gentle, the fashion in which her irises were the same chocolate hue they had always been, but the stars had somehow become her pupils— _no_ , the entirety of _space_ had reflected in her eyes. It was indescribable, and yet . . .

Yet the only emotion he could compare it to was pure, unadulterated love.

_I love you, Farkle._

Riley had told him this phrase over a billion times, but never had she said it with such a reverence that made Farkle’s entire being quake and crumble, like it was an earth-shattering revelation. A veneration to end all venerations, exactly the way Farkle had told her on that rooftop a few months ago when he knew she was his everything ‘til the bitter end.

Farkle couldn’t understand. First of all, didn’t she tell him on New Year’s that she _didn’t_ harbor the same affections as he did? And second of all, why now? Why now of all times, when he’s since moved on for _her_ sake?

He just didn’t get it.

Suddenly, the room was spinning too fast and he felt his chest hurt as he began to suffocate from the proximity of the other people surrounding him. He stepped back from Riley, his mouth drawn into a tight, thin line.

“We should go,” he stated simply. Riley looked up at him, puzzled by the sudden change of pace, but nodded her head in understanding, watching as he left the tent to call a taxi. Farkle inhaled and exhaled to calm himself, his hand shaking as he retrieved his phone from his pocket. And as he waited for the call to pick up, he repeated this mantra over and over in his head until he could convince himself that it was true:

 

_I’ve moved on. I’ve moved on. I’ve moved on._

_No more hurt. No more hurt. No more hurt._

Farkle was awfully tired of weddings.


	14. Is It Getting Better, Or Do You Feel The Same

“Oooh, Farkle! You owe me two-hundred bucks for landing on my property!” Riley exclaimed, bouncing excitedly in her spot.

“What?! No way!” Farkle complained.

“Yes way! Or are you trying to argue with the rules because you’re a big whiny baby?” she teased. Farkle huffed, narrowing his eyes and staring at her. Riley pushed her forehead up against his and stared back, challenging him in return. They held their positions like that for a good few minutes until Naomi sneezed, causing Farkle to look away.

“Ha! I _win!_ Fork the money over, Minkus!” she extended her hand out, waiting for the fake money to land in her palm.

“ _Ugh_ ,” he muttered, handing her the _Monopoly_ dollars begrudgingly before turning back towards Naomi to tell her, “Bless you!” She smiled at him, amused.

“Gee, thanks,” she said, but he could tell she was only joking.

Life fell into a normal pattern for Farkle. Nowadays, it was mostly work and Naomi that preoccupied his time, with the exception of his friends as often as he could. He had a lot of projects that took up all of his time, causing him to spend late nights at the office. Their remedy to his busy schedule was to have a game night whenever he had an hour or two free, playing board games like _Monopoly_ and _Sorry!_ and just having a good time overall.

Sometimes it was Maya, Lucas, Farkle, Naomi, Zay, and Riley playing together, but whenever Isadora was in town, she took Riley’s place so that the other couples could have a “couple’s night”. Farkle didn’t keep in contact as much with Riley, but whenever she was over to play games, it was like their problems disappeared and they were kids again, fighting over who was going to get the red piece in _Sorry!_ or the thimble in _Monopoly_. It was all good and easy for Farkle, and he liked not having to worry about much.

It was comfortable. Farkle liked comfortable.

Things with Naomi were going well, too. He enjoyed her company immensely, always loved hearing the stories she had to tell about her day at Minkus International and whatever weird experience she had outside of work (she had those _often_.) Farkle would try to explain to the best of his ability what project they were working on at his office, and Naomi would simply listen despite Farkle’s premonition that she had no idea what he was talking about. They had even told each other they loved one another, which was also a big relationship milestone. It was perfect, and Farkle loved everything about it.

He spent the rest of his week fairly happy, not even daring to let the rain that fell on Friday ruin his mood. Farkle was determined to believe that his life was making a 180°, and he was finally having that sort of peace he was longing for. He did wish he could get out from work earlier, but if that was just one little sacrifice that had to be made on his path to happiness, then he was a-okay with that.

When he finished up for the day at work, he shuffled around to get his work space cleaned up in the lab before setting off to retrieve his bag from his office, taking his lab coat off and hanging it up on the hook on the door when he reached it. As he gathered the last of his belongings and packed them up in his bag, his office phone started ringing. Farkle picked it up off the hook, answering it.

“Hello?”

 _“Oh, good. You’re still here. Minkus, could you come to my office for a moment before leaving?”_ his boss asked.

“Uh, sure thing,” Farkle told him.

_“Thank you. I’ll see you in a minute.”_

Farkle hung up the phone, wondering what he was being called over for. It wasn’t strange for him to talk to his boss at all, but normally he saved those conversations for during the day when they were working on things in the office, not in the evening when mostly everyone was leaving to go home. He exited his office and locked it up before heading down the hall and to the left, searching for Dr. Holland’s own crook, hidden away towards the end. His knuckles rapped on the door softly before he opened the door, poking his head in.

“Ah, Farkle Minkus. Come on in,” Dr. Holland told him, waving him inside his office. “Could you please take a seat? This won’t take too long.”

Farkle did as he was told, but he couldn’t help shaking his own leg, nervously awaiting what Dr. Holland was going to tell him. Was he going to fire him? No, that was silly. He was an excellent worker and they were well off at the company. Maybe he mussed something up and Dr. Holland was calling him in to yell at him? Again, that was an unlikely reason. Dr. Holland wasn’t the kind of person to blow up at people randomly. He was nice and even-keeled, and he would explain calmly what wrong instead of yelling.

So what was he here for?

He listened to Dr. Holland type away at his computer keyboard for a moment before swiveling in his chair back towards Farkle completely, folding his hands at his desk.

“Now, I know you’re probably wondering why I brought you up here, and let me say first that this is not for anything bad at all. It’s very good, actually,” Dr. Holland prefaced. “You’re one of my best and brightest, which is why I thought of you first for this opportunity. I know you haven’t been here for a long time and have settled well, but I figured you’d like to hear my offer.”

“What offer?” Farkle asked him. Dr. Holland grinned.

“There’s a position open at BioLabs in Seattle, Washington. It’s a biomedical engineer job, of course, but you’d be one of the higher ups, as well as have quite the increase in salary. You’d be making one-hundred and five-thousand dollars a year, and you’d have to leave in two weeks to take the job. How does that sound to you?”

Farkle was dumbfounded.

This was an _incredible_ opportunity for him. He’d heard about BioLabs when he was back in California, but he never imagined working there _himself_. Plus, he’d be getting quite the pay increase, as well as doing more prestigious biomedical engineering work. It’d be hard to say no to that.

But . . .

But he was very happy where he was. He was happy to be back around his friends and family and Farkle had only  _just_ begun his life over in New York. Was he really finished here? Was he destined to be elsewhere?

“You don’t have to answer right now if you need to think it over,” Dr. Holland told him after a long pause of radio silence from Farkle’s end. “Just let me know by Monday, okay?”

“I think I can do that,” Farkle agreed, standing up from his chair. “Thank you so much for this opportunity, Dr. Holland,” he told his boss, shaking his hand before exiting the room.

As he approached the elevator and hit the button to ride it down, his brain was full of a billion thoughts. He didn’t really know what his choice was—if he was asked months ago, before returning back to New York, he probably would’ve said yes in a heartbeat. But he’d been back quite a while now, and he’d since re-rooted himself back in the city he loved so dearly. Could he really just leave that behind?

Farkle got on the elevator, pressing the first-floor button while thinking it over some more. When the elevators opened again, he hurriedly exited out of the building and hailed a cab, knowing _exactly_ where he needed to go.

 

//

 

Farkle knocked at the apartment door when he arrived, anticipating the resident to answer. The door swung open and Naomi stood there, Chinese take-out in hand, her brows raised in surprise.

“Farkle! I didn’t realize you’d be coming over tonight. C’mon inside!”

He followed her in and she shut the door behind them, placing her lo mein on the dinner table, enveloping him in a hug.

“How’s it going, babe?” she asked him.

“I need to talk to you about something. Can we sit down on the couch?” Naomi nodded her head.

“Yeah, of course.” Farkle laid his bag on the table and walked to the living room, taking a seat in the empty spot next to Naomi. He breathed a moment before grabbing her hands, squeezing them.

“Naomi, I’ve just been offered a job to work at BioLabs. It’s one-hundred and five-thousand dollars a year, and I’d be one of the main engineers there,” he told her.

“That’s amazing, Farkle! I’m so proud of you!” she smiled, leaning in to hug him. Farkle stopped her before she could, holding up a hand.

“Wait, there’s something else,” he said. “It’s in Seattle, Washington, and I’d have to move two weeks from now.” Naomi processed what he said a moment before tilting her head.

“So are you going to take it?” she inquired of him.

“That’s what I was going to ask you. I wanted to know if you wanted to come move with me to Washington.” Naomi remained speechless a moment, her mouth agape and her eyes wide as she thought over Farkle’s request. It was bold, for sure, but he thought it was what he wanted.

“Oh, _Farkle_ ,” she began, brow crinkled as she offered him a tiny grin, “I would love to, but—”

“But?” he asked.

“But I _can’t_. I love you, I really do, but I don’t think this is what _you_ want.”

“What do you mean?”

“It means that while I’ve had a fun time with you, I don’t think this is something that could endure,” she explained sadly. Farkle didn’t understand.

“Why can’t we work?”

“Because you’re still in love with Riley,” she answered him simply, leaving Farkle the speechless one this time.

That was ridiculous! He _loved_ spending time with Naomi. He _loved_ hanging out with her and watching movies and talking science together.

Before he could finish his own argument in his head, Naomi added something that shocked Farkle to the core.

“And Riley is in love with _you_ , Farkle.”

 _“W-What?”_ he stammered.

“I’ve seen the way you two look at each other like there’s no one else in the world. You may love the things we do together, but you don’t really love me as a person. You love Riley wholly, and if there’s anyone you should be asking to accompany you to Seattle, it’s her. You owe it to yourself to be happy, Farkle. Don’t throw away that shot; take it.”

“So that means . . .?” he continued to press.

“That means we’re breaking up, I’m afraid. I was hoping we'd have a little time left, but . . . I’ve had a lovely time with you, but it’s hard to be in a relationship with someone who’s in love with someone else. Thank you for everything, Farkle.”

As Naomi wrapped him in a hug and sent him on his way out her door, Farkle was trying his best to mull over what she had told him, thinking about it all the way to the sidewalk. He didn’t hail a cab right away, just found a bench, sat, and thought. He thought so hard that it felt like his brain might explode or turn into jelly or something, because nothing and everything made sense.

 

_I’ve seen the way you look two at each other like there’s no one else in the world._

_Because you’re still in love with Riley, Farkle._

_And Riley is in love with **you**. _

He’d been trying his best to ignore that notion since they’d danced at the wedding, but what Naomi said couldn’t be anything but true. He would always love Riley and he would always be _in love_ with Riley because she was the one. She was the one that kept him grounded, that could make him smile when he felt like his whole world was crumbling. She had always loved him unconditionally and he her, and they were each other’s best friends and each other’s everything. Farkle couldn’t doubt that, not for a second.

Naomi was right, and he needed to see Riley.

_Now._

 

//

 

Riley’s apartment had luckily only been a few blocks away from Naomi’s, and as soon as the rain began to pour down again, Farkle knew that trying to get a taxi would be next to impossible. So instead he ran down the sidewalk, his bag flopping against his side as the rain splattered against his face, his heart racing in his chest. He watched the street signs carefully and took right and left turns when he needed to, and as soon as he saw the familiar, faded red-brick building belonging to Riley, he made a beeline straight inside and to the side stairs.

Farkle only slipped a couple of times before reaching the fifth floor, swinging the metal door open wide, trails of rain droplets from his person following behind him. He stopped abruptly when he reached her door, only pausing a moment to catch his breath before knocking rapidly for her attention.

 _Come on, come on, come on,_ he urged in his mind. _Be home._

Riley answered the door, her face full of concern when Farkle appeared before her, wet as can be from the pouring rain.

“Farkle, what are you doing here?” she asked, adding as an afterthought, “More importantly, what are you doing here dripping wet?”

“Can I talk to you?” he asked a question in return. Riley shook her head, bewildered, but ushered him inside, disappearing for only a moment to retrieve a towel for him. When she offered it, he denied it, his mind focused on more important things.

“So, what do you need to talk to me about all dripping wet for?”

“I got a job offer in Seattle. They’re asking me to move there in two weeks,” Farkle answered. Riley beamed at him.

“That’s great! Are you going to take it?”

“There’s another thing I need to address first.”

“What’s that?” she inquired.

“Riley, I’m in love with you,” he stated firmly, déjà vu ringing throughout his mind, but this time he was confident and nothing could stop him.

“What?”

“And you’re in love with me,” he told her. Riley dropped the towel in her hands immediately, an astonished expression on her face.

“Farkle, I don’t . . . I . . . what?” He grabbed her hands in his, hands that were wildly warm compared to his clammy, cold ones, staring her straight in the eyes.

“I want you to come to Seattle with me,” he said. “Or tell me to stay. Acknowledge that you have some inkling of feelings for me, because I know you do, Riley.”

“B-But Naomi?” she stuttered, a dazed look in her eyes.

“We broke up,” Farkle stated. “So?”

“So? _So?_ Farkle I . . . I _can’t_ ,” she finally gave him her response to his question, making his heart drop like a weight into his stomach. He let go of her hands, a betrayed look crossing his face.

“Can’t, or _won’t?_ ” he asked her. “There’s one thing I don’t understand, Riley. Why is it that everyone notices that you look at me the same way I look at you, and they all _know_ you love me the way I love you, but you can’t ever admit that to me?”

“It’s not that simple, Farkle,” Riley told him pointedly, but Farkle was just disappointed.

“ _Yes_ , it _is_ and you know it. I just don’t get it. Is it really that hard to love me?”

 _“That’s not it!”_ Riley yelled. Farkle stood there a long moment before uttering softly,

_“Then tell me to stay.”_

They both gazed at each other a while longer, the silence becoming unbearable for Farkle. But then Riley uttered one word, one simple, _stupid_ word, and Farkle knew his decision on whether to stay or to go had been set in stone.

_“No.”_

Farkle left Riley in her apartment without another word, angry, just _angry_ , at Riley and at the world, and he knew that he could accept change.

 

He called his boss on Saturday and took the job.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeaaaaah, sorry about that angst there. But fear not! One more chapter to go!!! 
> 
> Tune in soon to find out :)


	15. Get Out Of My Heart, She Won't

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so I felt really bad for leaving you guys with that last chapter, so here's the final one. I hope you all enjoyed the fic, and I definitely have more stuff in the works, so stay tuned! :)

Farkle finished packing up one of the last of his boxes, sealing it up with packaging tape before collapsing on his floor in an exhausted heap. Moving was never fun, and he hoped he wouldn’t have to do it again for a really long time.

He remained on his back for a few more minutes before finding the will to get up onto his feet, pushing the sleeves of his sweatshirt up after and ditching his room to get a snack from the kitchen. Zay was hanging out at the island when he arrived at the fridge, typing away at his phone as Farkle grabbed the orange juice container.

“You almost done?” Zay asked without looking up from his phone. Farkle nodded his head, stealing a swig of juice straight from the container.

“Yup,” Farkle answered him, wiping his mouth off with his forearm. “Just a few more boxes to go and I’ll be set.”

“Do you _have_ to leave?” Zay pouted. Farkle thinned his lips.

“Yeah, I do. It’ll be good for me.” Zay seemed skeptical of Farkle’s answer, but he didn’t press, rising from the stool by the island to join his friend in the kitchen.

“You know, it’s not going to be the same without you here. Who’s going to throw stuff at me in the morning when I’m not up already?”

“Maybe you should set a lot more alarms?” Farkle offered.

“Or watch stupid movies with me in the morning?”

“I bet Isadora would love to do that if you ask her to come stay here with you.”

“Who’s going to be my best friend in the whole wide world named Farkle Minkus, though? You got an answer to that?” Farkle didn’t, but instead opened his arms for a hug, which Zay gave into without hesitation.

“I’m gonna miss you, too,” Farkle told him, getting choked up a bit. “I wouldn’t trade this past half-year for the world. You’re the best roommate I’ve ever had.”

“Yeah, well don’t go getting sentimental on me, Minkus,” Zay laughed, sniffling a little bit. They broke the hug and Farkle kicked at the ground absentmindedly, sighing.

“You got anything to do tonight? We could do one last movie marathon,” Farkle suggested, but Zay shook his head.

“I would love to, but I already promised Maya and Lucas I’d meet them for dinner, and I’ve gotta leave for that now. Maybe we could do a movie later on?”

“Sounds good to me. See you in a bit,” Farkle waved as Zay departed, leaving him alone to his thoughts for the rest of the night. He stalked off towards the couch and collapsed onto it in a huff, staring at the ceiling as if awaiting some sort of answer from it for a question he had repeating inside his head nonstop since he took the job offer. He would’ve stared longer, too, but then an abrupt knock came from the door, forcing him to peel his focus away from the ceiling towards the front of the apartment.

“You know the door is unlocked!” Farkle called out to it, assuming it was Zay who had forgotten his keys for the billionth time since he’d lived there. But when the door opened, it wasn’t Zay who had appeared. Farkle sat up, his jaw dropping when he saw who was standing there covered head-to-toe in rain.

 _“Riley?”_ he stood up immediately, confused by her presence. She was panting as if she had run across New York City to appear at his place, and he was shocked overall that she would even want to be there. They hadn’t talked since he left her at her own apartment, angry and disappointed at her.

Now? He didn’t know what to think.

“Farkle, I need to talk to you,” Riley told him, dropping everything she had at her feet. “And I just need you to listen to me and let me speak.”

“Uh, alright?” Farkle said, practically speechless as he inched closer towards her, still leaving a palpable amount of distance between them. He was wary, had a right to be, and he didn’t think Riley would fault him for that.

“You were right,” she breathed, a crinkle forming in between her brows.

“Right about what?” he asked back.

“You were right about everything, because of _course_ you were right—you’re freaking Farkle Minkus!” she exclaimed, throwing her arms in the air. “I’ve just been scared of my own feelings and change, and I didn’t want to accept that things being different would be good, and I didn’t want to be the person to hold you back from doing something amazing. You’ve always been my rock since the day I met you, and I thought that, if that changed, I would lose you. Losing you is the worst thing I could possibly think of.

“But I still managed to lose you because I was so _scared_. I was scared that if things changed I could end up losing the best thing in my life, so I tried so hard to keep things the way they had been for years, but I alienated you in the process. But the thing is, I don’t care about that anymore. Honestly, fuck _all of that_. You’re my important person, the Topanga to my Cory. I need you to be in my life because without you, it’s shitty and I _hate_ it. And I know it’s probably too late now and you’re supposed to be leaving tomorrow, but stay, Farkle. _Please_ , stay because you’re my important person, and I love you _so much_. I’m _in_ love with you. So stay for me, Farkle.”

When she finished, Farkle just stared at her incredulously, his mind buzzing. He watched her expression become crestfallen when he hadn’t responded to her, and he finally managed to find the words he had been searching for.

“I guess I’ll just go now. I’m sorry for—” Riley tried to retreat, but Farkle stopped her in her tracks.

“Riley?” he called out to her, breathless.

“Yes?” her eyes became bright and expansive, full of bright stars like he had come to know.

“I love you, too. So shut up.”

And he was walking across the living room to where she was, placing his hands on the sides of her face, his mouth on hers in an instant. It was an explosive kiss, the kind that he’d use to describe the forming of the cosmos, and it was like her heart was a blackhole, sucking him in with no way out. Because that was the way it had always been—Farkle was always Riley’s, from the very beginning until the end of time. She was his everything, his important person, the Cory to his Topanga, too. She was his universe, and his life had always, _always_ revolved around her.

He didn’t want that to stop ever.

 _“Oh,”_ Riley had muttered once they broke the kiss, her forehead rested up against Farkle’s as they caught their breath.

 _“Yeah,”_ Farkle muttered back, a wide, beaming grin engulfing his entire face.

“So, do you think you’ll stay in New York?” she asked him. Farkle let out a breathy laugh, pulling Riley in closer to him, not daring to let go of her for a single second as his mouth hovered over hers, his breath ghosting her lips.

“For you, Riley Matthews? _Anything_.”

“Hey, have you guys seen my keys—OOOOOOH! WHAT?! _WHAT?!_ ” Zay entered through the door right then, jumping excitedly when he saw Farkle and Riley, together at last.

“Oh, hi, Zay,” Riley giggled, waving at him before burying her face into Farkle’s shoulder.

“Does this mean you’re staying? You’re staying now, right?” Zay asked.

“Yes, Zay, I’m staying in New York City,” Farkle said, snorting. Zay ran in and wrapped the both of them in a tight bear-hug, grinning from ear to ear.

“Yay!! My best friends are in love and staying in New York!” he shouted, making Farkle roll his eyes.

“Alright, alright. Now get off,” he shrugged Zay off of them.

“When’s the wedding?”

 _“Zay!”_ Farkle coughed, blushing furiously while earning a smug look from Zay.

“Okay, I get it, I’ll go already. I’ll leave you two love birds in peace. For _now_. But when I get to that restaurant I’m totally telling Maya and Lucas, so you’ve got like thirty minutes or so to yourself. See ya!” Zay waved as he grabbed his keys, shutting the door behind him abruptly. Farkle sighed.

“Now where were we? Oh, I remember,” Riley told him, pulling him by the hood of his jacket, pressing her lips against his. Farkle smiled happily, his heart singing.

“I guess I could get used to this.”

“You better, ‘cause there’s more where that came from,” she chuckled.

And Farkle realized that, sure, New York was where he belonged, but home?

His home was always, _always_ Riley Matthews, and he wouldn’t change that for the world


End file.
